有哪些发明你希望它从未诞生过？（系列二） [美国媒体]

-------------译者：龙腾翻译总管-审核者：龙腾翻译总管------------

What technology do you wish was never invented?

有哪些发明你希望它从未诞生过？（系列二）


-------------译者：Skyline AJ-审核者：龙腾翻译总管------------

Zakary Stahlsmith Founder at ApexDrop Influence Marketing Answered Aug 21
Voicemail.

语音信箱

Before I get into it let's get this straight. Voicemail needs to die. There is absolutely no reason on Earth that we need voicemail any longer. Voicemail may even WANT to die. Just call her and tell me you don't hear the quiet desperation.

在我开始前，让我先直说一点。语音信箱需要消失。在地球上，没有任何原因能够证明我们仍需要语音信箱。语音信箱自己甚至都想要消失。给她打个电话（试试），然后告诉我你没有接通到（她那）令人沉默绝望的语音信箱里。

Maybe you're a voicemail victim like me?

也许你跟我一样同是语音信箱的受害者？

It all started so innocently. Out of the blue someone calls from an unknown number on your cell. There are two thoughts you're most likely going to have …

最初一切都是如此天真美好。突然你收到了一个陌生来电。你最有可能会有这两种想法：

1.“Who the hell is calling me?” OR
2.“They better be on fire”

1.”是TM谁打给我的？“或者
2.“他们最好是有什么要紧事。“

You then click “ignore” and go back to your business.

然后你点击”忽略“重新埋回你的事情中。

20 seconds later that infamous little jingle on your phone goes off. Yippee … a voicemail!!

20秒后，你手机发出那臭名昭着的“叮当”提示声响了。好开心哦.......一条语音留言欸！！！！

You give it a couple minutes waiting for the little text message chime to save you from listening to it.

你花了几分钟的时间等待短信消息的铃声以节省听语音留言的时间。

Minutes pass … no chime.

但几分钟过去了.....没有铃响。

Somehow you believed that when you hit the ignore button that this would initiate a reasonable human being’s empathy using the proper cell phone etiquette which suggests switching to a much preferred current day form of communication like texting …

不知为何你认为当你点击“忽略”时，你含沙射影地向来电人传递了一个关于使用手机礼仪的合理共识，暗示其切换到现如今更偏好的联系方式，如短信.....

-------------译者：龙腾翻译总管-审核者：龙腾翻译总管------------

But no not this guy. NOPE - not today. This guy wants you to go through all the prompts to find out for sure who they are and what their demands are. Yes demands will be made -they never come without a price.

但不不不，这个家伙不会这么想。至少——今天不会这么做。这个家伙想要你听过所有的提示消息来确认他们的身份以及他们（打电话来）是出于什么请求。是的，那些请求他们已经想好了——他们绝不是没事找你聊。

Then you think it’s probably one of those “Hey it's me call me back” messages - oh what a joy! Those sure do make my day.

然后你以为可能是那些“嘿，（好久没联系了）是我XXX，给我回个电话哦”之类的消息——啊，真是高兴啊！那些消息确实使我开心。

Or even better since you didn't recognize the number it's gotta be one of those automated phone spam calls that you get to hear the last part of. Press 1 to hear more! FUN!

或者说还能让你更开心点。因为你不认识这个号码，所以这一定是那种自动电话系统打来的垃圾语音，你听到的是语音内容的最后一部分。按1的话能听到更多内容（资讯）！简直是太有趣了！



Now of course nobody on Earth wants to check their voicemail what we all REALLY want to do is to remove that evil red “1” notification. (Unless of course you're one of those non-OCD freaks that doesn't mind the red dots - how do you live with such chaos?!)

当然，地球上没有哪个人想要查听他们的语音信箱。我们真正想做的是移除掉那个邪恶的红色“1”通知。（当然，除非你是那种不介意红点的非强迫症患者，否则你完全不能忍受红点造成的图标不简洁。）

There's only one way outta this mess

只有一条路可以摆脱这种混乱。

You finally go and spend that torturous 2 minutes getting through the prompts - and listen to the sooooo-important-it-couldn't-be-a-text-message-voicemail …

你最终只能忍受痛苦的2分钟去完成那些提示语音——听着那因为内容太重要所以不能通过文本信息传递的语音留言......

Oh it's mom she's calling from a different phone and she was checking to see if I got her text message from yesterday.

哦，原来是妈妈用别人的手机给我打电话，查看我昨天是否收到了她发的短信。

Thank God I didn't pick up

感谢上帝，我没有接那通电话。

 -------------译者：老绵羊April-审核者：龙腾翻译总管------------

Voicemail just won't die

语音信箱不会消亡。

So it turns out voicemail is an archaic time-waster and nobody likes it. But it hangs on undead with bits and pieces falling off but still ready to bite your ear off and chew on the gristle. But this isn't what makes it a zombie …

所以事实证明了语音信箱已经过时且浪费时间，没有人喜欢它。但它就如僵尸一般，虽死却仍能活动，即使残肉（被打得）零碎掉落只剩骨架却仍叫嚣着准备咬下你的耳朵，啃食你的身骨。但这都不是它变成同僵尸一般存在的原因....

No joke I had an epiphany on how to help the world stop being a victim of voicemail … I would go on to share this knowledge with all my loved ones who would put me up on their shoulders thanking me for saving them so much time and heartache.

不开玩笑了，我突然顿悟该怎么帮助世人不再受语音信箱的迫害……我将会继续将这些知识分享给所有我爱的人，他们会感激到（将我拥抱）让我的头靠向他们的肩膀，因为我替他们节省了很多时间，消除掉了让他们头痛的根源。

My solution … just shut it.

我的解决办法就是……把它关掉。

But how do you shut off voicemail?

但是怎么关掉语音信箱呢？

Oh how naive I was. When I had this realization I quickly called my phone provider and explained my conundrum. “Please just turn my voicemail off and make it go back to saying the person you are calling doesn’t have a voice mailbox setup”

哎，我以前真是太天真了。当我意识到这一点的时候，我迅速给我的手机供应商打了电话并解释了我的困扰。“请帮我关掉语音信箱，让它回到说你所拨打的用户没有设置语音信箱的时候”。

The rep then goes on to tell me that they’re sorry but once voicemail is activated … there is literally no way to turn it off.

然后他们的代表说他们对我致以歉意，但是语音信箱一旦被激活……就没有办法再关掉它们了。

I had to laugh… You mean I woke up a freaking voicemail ZOMBIE!!!???

我不由得笑了……你的意思是我唤醒了一个语音信箱僵尸！

-------------译者：龙腾翻译总管-审核者：龙腾翻译总管------------

You literally cannot kill voicemail. The best you can do is to try and imagine what voicemail looks like if it took the shape of a human body and then attempt to stab it or shoot it … just know they will survive but you'll feel slightly better somehow.

你根本无法灭掉语音信箱。你能做的最好办法就是在脑海中将语音信箱拟化成人类，然后你就可以尽情地刺杀它或是枪爆了它。....但是你要知道，它们还是会活下来，只是你会感觉好点。

I thought about it for a bit and the only real way I think you can kill voicemail … is you just stop using it.

我想了一下，我认为你能杀了语音信箱的唯一方式......是停止使用它。

Problem is that red dot has too much power over me - it's just not that simple.

问题是，问题是红点对我来说影响力很大——事情没办法简单（说明）。

So I try telling everyone who leaves me voicemail to just stop leaving me voicemails by text but it doesn't work.

所以我尽量告诉那些给我留了语音留言的人，不要给我留语音留言，发文本信息就行，但是这并没有用。

A couple months later after checking a whole bunch of voicemails I'm still thinking about this and come up with a reasonable solution. I finally found a way for the voicemail zombie and me to live in harmony and it's now become something I'm know for in my circles …

几个月后，在查听了一大堆语音留言之后，我仍在思考这个问题，并想出了一个合理的解决方案。我最终还是找到了一个可以和语音信箱僵尸和谐共处的方法，这使我在我的（交际圈里）出了名......

Do what I did: Call your voicemail now and set a new greeting. "I no longer listen to voicemail. Please contact me by text or email."

跟我这么做：给你的语音信箱设置一个新的问候语。“我不再接听语音信箱，请通过短信或电子邮件联系我。”

You’re welcome

不用谢哦。

Only telemarketers or your mom will still leave voicemails … it's quite literally the perfect filter (I LOVE YOU MOM!)

只有电话销售员和你的妈妈仍会给你留语音邮件......这法子还真是个完美的过滤器（我是爱你的，妈妈！）

Oh and if you're one of the lucky ones who never set up your voicemail I commend your lazy ass or your incredible foresight - either way you're winning.

哦，如果你是那些没有设置语音信箱功能的幸运儿之一，我赞扬你的懒鬼行为或者说你真是太有远见了——无论你是哪一种，你都是赢家。

 -------------译者：花开花落花满天-审核者：火星侯少------------

Pratim Das studied at National Institute of Technology Jamshedpur upxed Sep 10
Pop Up Ads!

弹出式广告！

Though many people have written different answers regarding this question and I respect their opinion but in my opinion this is the worst thing ever invented(taking every form of invention into account.)

虽然很多人对这个问题有不同的回答，我也尊重他们的看法，但是在我看来，（弹出式广告）是有史以来最糟糕的发明。（将各种发明考虑在内）

Just imagine you are about to watch your favourite video or movie

想象一下你正要观看你最喜爱的视频或电影。



You are watching it with too much excitement and suddenly these come to the screen

当你看得正兴奋的时候，突然屏幕上弹出了广告。



Leave watching movies just open a media player(mx player in my case)

不看电影了，随意打开一个媒体播放器（我通常是用MX播放器）。



And it will automatically start refreshing and then a box appears with ‘showing ads’ written in it(your mind is full of rage by then)

它会自动刷新，然后出现写有“显示广告”字样的弹窗（这时你怒火中烧）。



And wow! Here it is the one and only

哇！然后就会出现一个....



Pop up ad! And clicking it will again open another tab.

弹出式广告！点击它，会转至一个浏览器窗口界面。

How do you feel that time? Moreover while watching videos online you can skip the ads but sometimes you cant even skip the add those few seconds feel like hours!

那个时候你感觉如何？此外，在网上在线观看视频时，有些广告你是可以跳过的，但是有时候你不能跳过，广告播放的那几秒钟让你感觉像是度过了几个小时！

 -------------译者：海蓝藏獒-审核者：龙腾翻译总管------------

Frankly speaking pop up ad is one of the most irritating and frustrating technology ever invented. And to add to it the inventor of this Ethan Zuckerman(This man)himself apologised to the whole world saying that he had unintentionally created one of the most hated forms of advertising on the web.

坦白地说，弹出式广告是最恼人的和最没用的的技术发明。而且发明它的人——伊凡·佐克曼（就是下图这个人）曾向全世界致歉，为自己无意间在网络上创造出了一个令人深恶痛绝的广告形式而道歉。



The Man Who Invented Pop-Up Ads Says 'I'm Sorry'

这个发明弹出式广告的人说：“对不起。”

blxing ads flashing banner ads singing ads.Escaping advertising was already a hopeless endeavor online in the early 2000s when Web browsers introduced pop-up ads an almost unavoidable trick by websites to generate revenue. Hundreds of angry Facebook groups have been created to deride pop-up ads. Though pop-up blockers were eventually created you still never know when you're going to click on a lix that will bring a flurry of pop-up ads or freeze the computer or smartphone screen altogether.

各种闪烁的广告、闪烁的横幅广告和唱歌的广告。自从Web浏览器通过推出弹出式广告创收以后，在2000年早前时期，逃避广告基本上是无望了。为嘲笑弹出式广告，数百个愤怒的脸书讨论组成立。虽然现在有弹窗拦截器，但是你永远不知道，当你点击一个链接时，会不会出现那些使你的电脑或手机屏幕死机的弹出式广告。

And so I wish it had never been invented.

因此，我希望弹出式广告从来都没有被发明过。

Thank You.

谢谢。