是她太过谨慎还是我太过粗心？ [美国媒体]

-------------译者：wwwxxy-审核者：roroho------------



LittleCritterCRUnited States 于 2 天前 * 发表
So this weekend my train was cancelled and I needed to find a hotel in the area because I couldn’t book another train until the next day. My Chinese friend who was in a different city and worrying about me a lot was a little upset with me because I wasn’t so quick to take her advice of getting into a taxi and going to the hotel that she picked out for me. I was hesitant because although the hotel she found was much cheaper than hotels near the train station it would cost a lot of money for a taxi). I asked some people on the street if they knew where this other hotel was that I had booked but they didn’t know where it was so they continued to help me find it. They couldn’t find it so then they tried to help me find a hotel near the train station.

这周末我的火车班次被取消了然后我得在这附近找个酒店，因为到明天之前我没法再定别的火车了。我在另一个城市的中国朋友很担心我，她有一点生我气因为我没有很快地听她的建议去打个的到她给我选的酒店。我犹豫是因为虽然她给我挑的酒店比火车站附近的便宜很多，但是来回打的要花不少钱。我在街上问了一些人知不知道我之前订的酒店在哪，但是他们都不知道，所以他们继续帮我一起找。然而他们也都找不到酒店在哪，所以之后他们努力帮我找了家火车站附近的酒店。

Anyway my friend was very worried about me and she made a comment about how she was worried that I could have been like kidnapped or something. She was concerned that the people who were helping me find a hotel would do some thing bad with me. She told me that China isn’t safe like America and here teenagers are drugged and people sell their organs and babies are kidnapped. I tried telling her that I never felt like I was in danger and that the US isn’t safe like she thinks it is but she questioned my ability to sense danger. I tried telling her that my inability to communicate with people (because I don’t speak much Chinese) is separate from common sense and knowing how to avoid dangerous situations but I don’t think she agreed on that. Yeah not knowing Chinese can make you more vulnerable but bad shit happens all the time whether you speak the language or not.

总之，我朋友很担心我，她形容她担心到怕我是不是被绑架了或者怎么样。她怕那些帮我找酒店的人会对我做坏事。她告诉我中国不像美国一样安全，这里青少年会被注射药物然后有人会卖他们的器官，小孩子会被绑架。我试着告诉她我从来没觉有我有危险，而且美国不像她想的那么安全，但是她质疑了我感知危险的能力。我尝试告诉她我和人沟通的能力{因为我不怎么说中文}和我的常识以及怎么避开危险情况是分开来的，但是我认为她不会同意这些话。是，不懂英文让你处于弱势更易受到伤害，但是不管你会不会说中文，坏事一直都在发生。

Idk I’m kind of frustrated by how worried she was about me. Like her telling me basically not to talk to strangers because they could be “bad people” and only talk to people you trust. She said she worried about me like I was her daughter even though she’s younger than me and I think she’s a bit more naïve than myself. But I’m not Chinese so what do I know?

我不知道，她太担心我了，搞得我有点泄气。比如她告诉我一般别和陌生人说话，因为他们可能是“坏人”，只和你信任的人说话。她说她担心我跟担心女儿似的，即使她比我小，而我认为她要比我单纯。但我不是中国人，所以我又知道些什么呢？

For context the two people trying to help me find a hotel were nice and I think they just wanted to help. They spent like 2 hours helping me (it should not have taken this long obviously but we spent some time trying to find a 7 Days Inn). I guess I felt like my friend (a former student) was a bit patronizing toward me. She said it’s common for Chinese to worry like this but to me (an almost-24-year-old American) it comes across as almost infantilizing. I think her parents worry about her a lot too.

前面提到的那两个努力帮我找酒店的人都很好，我觉得他们只是想帮忙。他们花了差不多两个小时来帮助我（本来不应该这么久的，但是我们想找一家七天酒店，这花了一些时间）。我觉得我朋友（之前是个学生）对我有点太过保护了。她说中国人这么担心挺正常的，但是对我来说（一个快24岁的美国人），这都快把我当小孩子了。我觉得她的父母也老是担心她。

Tl;dr: Like...just because I don’t know Chinese doesn’t mean that I’m gonna be drugged and hauled off for organ trafficking.

简言之…就因为我不懂中文并不意味着我会被注射药物然后被拖去卖器官。


-------------译者：wwwxxy-审核者：roroho------------

–]ssdv80gm2 51 指标 2 天前 
It's normal for Chinese to worry like this. Many kids grow up overprotected and what you experienced is what's the result. If you stay here for longer you will get used to it.

中国人会这么担心是意料之中的事。许多孩子都是在过度保护中长大的，你所经历的就是（被过度保护后）的结果。如果你在这呆的更久些，你就会习惯的。

[–]LittleCritterCRUnited States[S] 8 指标 2 天前 
Yeah...I’ve met a number of students whose parents won’t let them travel alone.

是的…我遇到过很多父母不让他们独自旅行的学生。

[–]ssdv80gm2 16 指标 1 天前 
Back in my young years when I still was in Europe I once tried to invite a Chinese girl out (she was approximately 20year old) but she said that here parents would not let her go out. I always thought that this was a cheap excuse and took me a couple of years in China until I realized that she probably said the truth...

当我年轻还在欧洲的时候，有一次我想约一个中国女孩出去（她差不多20岁），但是她说她父母不会让她出去的。我一直觉得这借口很烂，直到我在中国呆了几年后才意识到她说的是真的…

[–]LittleCritterCRUnited States[S] 6 指标 1 天前 
Yes. A lot of my college students have parents who won’t let them date

是啊，我大学很多的学生，他们父母不让他们约会。

[–]EmperorGeorgiou 12 指标 1 天前 
Overprotected children are common in China they are coddled and their hand held in everything they do from the cradle all the way to university. The result is adults who don't know how to make decisions on their own and who are afraid of just about anything (a tiny dog barking the wind blowing etc...) unless they are in a large group of friends/relatives. Stuff happens in other countries too but nowhere near as common.

被过度保护的孩子在中国很常见，从呱呱落地一直到读大学，他们被溺爱，无论干什么事父母都牵着他们的手。结果就是成年之后他们也不会自己做决定，什么东西都害怕（怕一只在吠的小狗，风吹等等…），除非他们是和很多朋友或者亲人在一起。这种事在别的国家也都有，但是在别的任何地方都说不上常见。

[–]LittleCritterCRUnited States[S] 3 指标 1 天前 
Yeah. A lot of students seem...sheltered at the very least

对，很多学生好像…至少是一直被庇护。

[–]Carrman099 4 指标 1 天前 
Yea it’s the strangest thing. We have a lot of international students at my uni and a lot of the Chinese students I’ve had classes with seem so unsure of themselves. It’s as if they have no confidence.

这是很奇怪的。我们大学有很多国际学生，和我一起上课的很多中国学生似乎极度缺乏信心，就像他们一点儿自信也没有一样。

-------------译者：wwwxxy-审核者：roroho------------

[–]Mr_Bakgwei 30 指标 2 天前 
First of all. Yes your friend was being overly cautious. That being said you should always keep your guard up. China isn't nearly as safe as most expats make it out to be especially outside the affluent bubble most live in. China like everywhere else has safe affluent areas. Expats be it managers in international corporations or teachers in expensive international schools tend to live and work in affluent and safe parts of the country. But there are definitely unsafe areas.

首先，是的，你的朋友是太过小心了。但是你也应该要保持警惕。中国并不像很多外国人认为的那样安全，尤其是在多数外国人生活的富裕地区之外。中国，像其他所有地方一样，有安全的富人区。外国人，不管他是跨国公司的管理层还是学费高昂的国际学校老师，多居住工作于中国富有而安全的区域。但是中国肯定也有不安全的地方。

If you watch Chinese news and know blue collar Chinese workers you will find out that its definitely not any more safe than Western Europe or most parts of the US. There are daily news reports on terrible violent crimes and I personally know a number of people who have been victims of crime. There is a big problem with sex trafficking and sex slavery that is only somewhat hinted at on the news. Girls and young women go missing all the time. That being said I've never heard of this happening to a white American or European although I've heard a few stories of this happening to overseas Chinese.

如果你看中国新闻，知道中国的蓝领工人，你就会发现它绝对不比西欧或者美国的大部分区域安全。每天的新闻都在报道可怕的暴力犯罪，我自己就认识很多曾经受害的人。不法性交易和性奴也是一个很大的问题，而这只会在新闻中隐晦地提到一点。一直都有女孩和年轻女人失踪。尽管如此，我还没有听说这发生在美国或者欧洲白人身上过，虽然我有听到过发生在海外华人身上的一些此类故事。

Just like anywhere else victims of crime are mostly people who put themselves in dangerous situations. The areas around train stations are places where criminals might target people. That's why they always tell you never to take a "black taxi" especially in those areas. And watch out for people approaching you for help or to try to help you. However in your case where you were the one approaching someone for help the possibility that you happened to approach a person who would do you harm is extremely low.

就像其他任何地方一样，犯罪的受害者们多是那些把自己放到危险情境中的人。火车站附近是罪犯瞄准目标的地方。这就是为什么他们告诉你不要打“黑车”，特别是在那些地方。小心那些接近你寻求帮助或者想要帮助你的人。但是，你这个情况是你接近别人寻求帮助，凑巧碰到有意加害你的人的这个概率极低。

[–]iwazaruu 13 指标 1 天前 
“China like everywhere else has safe affluent areas.”
I dunno man. Cities here aren't like cities back in America where there are clearly good neighborhoods and bad neighborhoods. People can live in a nice apartment but it's just the same like everywhere else in the city once they step outside their apartment complex.

“中国，就像其他所有地方一样，有安全的富人区。”
朋友，我不知道。这里的城市不像美国的城市一样有界限分明的富人区和贫民区。人们可以住在一栋高端的公寓里，但是一旦他们踏出公寓，这跟住在城市的其他地方没有任何区别。

Sanlitun an affluent place and home of diplomats and high earners is definitely the most dangerous place in Beijing for foreigners in terms of violence at least. That said even physical attacks are rare there.

三里屯，一个富人区，是不少外交官和高收入者居住的地方，但是至少在发生暴力事件的角度上来看，它是北京对外国人来说最危险的地方。但即便如此，物理袭击在那里都很少见。

-------------译者：JUMP-审核者：hht288------------

[–]supercharged0708 2 指标 1 天前
When was the last time if ever you saw in the news that a foreigner was drugged and had his organs harvested?

上一次你能在新闻上看到一个外国人被灌药然后被夺走器官是啥时候来着？（反讽）

[–]shinadoll 20 指标 1 天前
There’s clearly something else going on OP. If everywhere you are people feel compelled to manage protect and worry over you like you are a small child-maybe it’s not them maybe it’s you. I keep showing my 15 year old your posts...you’re becoming a cautionary tale.

楼主，这件事肯定还另有隐情。如果不管你在哪里，人们都不自觉地想像保护孩子一样保护担心你，那也许不是他们有问题，而是你有。我一直给15岁的孩子看你的帖子.....你的事成为一个警示故事。

Perhaps you don’t (particularly based on my simple review of your postings) project the air of someone who is mature and competent enough to be an independent traveler. I can’t even imagine being so lax as to find myself in a foreign city without sufficient lodging or at least the ability to locate lodging (whatever the cost to ensure my safety!) without having to roam the streets relying on strangers and becoming their burden. I’d honestly feel embarrassed just to admit that on multiple occasions people gave up hours of their life to help me when I had the financial means to resolve my own issue but I simply didn’t want to SPEND MY MONEY. Did it occur to you that you were taking advantage of the kindness of these strangers in begging them to SPEND THEIR TIME? In either instance? No? Just take from people and move on....

也许你没有（尤其基于我对你发帖内容的简单印象）表现出足够成熟能胜任独立旅行者的气息。我甚至无法想像自己能在一个没有充分住处，或者至少能够找到住处的外国城市里如此疏忽大意（不管确保我安全的代价有多大！)为了不流浪街头而去依赖陌生人给他人添负担。当人们花费他们生命的数个小时来帮助我，而我明明有经济条件来解决我个人的问题，仅因为我不想花费我的钱财而麻烦人们时，我真心会感到羞愧的。你是否想到你在利用他们的善心来浪费他们的时间，你是哪种情况？都不是？只是索取之后就离开吗....

Continuing to be the damsel constantly in distress isn’t cute or endearing and is an actual recipe for disaster.

不停的假装成落难少女并不可爱或讨人喜欢，只是个无穷的麻烦。

China’s safe enough but stupidity will always encourage an opportunist.

中国足够安全，但愚蠢总会鼓励投机分子。

[–]LittleCritterCRUnited States[S] 2 指标 1 天前
I never asked or expected them to stick around. All I did was ask if they knew where the hotel was and they were like “let’s find it.”

我从没要求或希望他们留下来帮我。我所做的只是问她们是否知道旅馆在哪，然后她们就说"那让我们一起来找找看吧"。

-------------译者：wwwxxy-审核者：龙腾翻译总管------------

[–]shinadoll 9 指标 1 天前 
You didn’t rebuff their offer though you could have. You didn’t go into a shop and ask for directions though you could have. You clearly looked and seemed desperate so as to engender pity from passers by.

虽然你本可以回绝他们提供的帮助，但是你没有。虽然你本可以走进一家商店，向店里的人问路，但是你也没有。你明显看起来很绝望从而引发过路人的同情。

This no doubt was an intentional effort in your part to elicit the most sympathetic ear much like many of your posts. You wanted someone to drop everything and help you and you engineered a scenario to ensure that likelihood.

这无疑是你故意表现出来的，去吸引别人来听你倾诉困难，就像你发出来的很多东西一样。你想要某些人扔下他们手头上的一切去帮助你，而你设计出一个情境来确保这个可能性。

Further if I read correctly didn’t you invite these perfect strangers into the privacy of your hotel room? From a non-romantic standpoint (if it was no judgment here!) don’t you understand that your actions are inherently risky? This startling lack of maturity and foresight in protecting your own safety is precisely why people feel that you are unable to fend for yourself.

而且，如果我看得没错，你没邀请这些帮你的陌生人进你的宾馆房间吧？从一个无关罗曼蒂克的角度来说（如果有的话，我并没有批判的意思！），你不知道你的行为隐藏着风险吗？在保护你自己的人身安全这件事上不够成熟以及缺少远见恰恰是别人认为你不能保护好你自己的原因。

[–]ihatenormalpeople 9 指标 2 天前 
You were lucky that people tried to help you.

大家都努力去帮你，你很是幸运。

I was looking for a hotel a couple years ago late in the evening and people thought I was a xinjiang dude trying to scam them. Took a long time until someone was willing to help.
It's common that Chinese people have a dystopian image of China where you get raped and kidnapped on every corner at night. In reality China is one of the safest places I have ever been to.

几年前的一个深夜，我当时在找一家酒店，但是人家都以为我是想要骗他们的新疆人。过了很久才有人愿意帮我。中国人对中国有着一个反乌托邦的印象，他们觉得如果晚上到阴暗偏僻的角落里你会被强奸和绑架，这样的想法很常见。事实上，中国是我呆过最安全的国家之一。

[–]silentdog176 1 指标 2 天前 
She’s too worried. China is basically safe foreigners even safer. Very few criminals against foreigners actually.

她太过担心了。 中国基本上是很安全的，外国人在这里甚至更安全。针对外国人的犯罪其实很少。

A few years ago there’s a foreigner missed a bicycle and many police help him find it as if his luxury Bmw has missing.

几年前，有个外国人丢了辆自行车，很多警察都帮他找车，搞得跟他丢了辆豪华宝马似的。

That’s why :)

这就是（我说外国人更安全）的原因 :)