你不喜欢日本和日本人的是？ [美国媒体]

-------------译者：龙腾翻译总管-审核者：龙腾翻译总管------------

What is something you don’t like about Japan and Japanese people?

你不喜欢日本和日本人的是？


-------------译者：jaden-审核者：roroho------------

Michelle Morehouse Mom of 3 owned by several animals work in cardiology upxed Oct 15
Something I don't like about Japan:

我不喜欢日本的地方:

My brother Jeff was married to a Japanese woman. He is American. They had a child together. They divorced and he won custody due to the mother's behavior. She lived within 20 minutes and had a lot of visitation to enjoy with their son. My brother held his son’s passport for safe keeping as the ex had threatened to move back to Japan and take their son with her. He also made contact with the local consulate and was assured the ex couldn't get their son a passport in the future.

我的哥哥杰夫是美国人，他娶了个日本女人，并生了一个孩子。后来他们离婚了，由于孩子母亲的不良行为，我哥获得了监护权。她住的地方到我哥家大概在20分钟路程以内，因此她有很多的探视时间去见他们的儿子。出于安全考虑，我哥哥一直保管着儿子的护照，因为他的前妻曾威胁他说要带着儿子搬回日本。为此他还联系当地的领事馆，并得到保证说他的前妻将来无法帮儿子办理新护照。

Fast forward a couple years to a day Jeff is to get his son back but ex and child don't show up at the arranged meeting place. Her phone is turned off. Her apartment is empty of personal effects and they are gone. Airport surveillance shows them boarding a plane a few days prior.

几年后的某天，我哥按约定去把儿子接回来，但前妻和孩子却没有出现在事先安排好的会面地点，她的手机关机，公寓里的私人物品也全不见了，他们就这样一走了之了。机场监控显示他们在几天前登上了飞机。

Jeff fights like a rabid dog legally and gets full custody in Japan as he already has it in the States. He goes to Washington D.C. to fight policy. He heads Bring Abducted Children Home (BAC Home) an organization to return children to their rightful parent. He travels to Japan when an investigator thought he had found his son hoping for a long awaited reunx. Wrong kid. It's been horribly expensive and all consuming of his life. The worst part of all is Jeff's broken spirit; it kills me. My brother hasn't seen or spoken to his son his only child in 7 years because Japan will not enforce anything in family court. Typical Japanese divorce looks like this: Mom keeps kids Dad goes away. That's not the type of father my brother is; this option does not work here.

我哥像疯狗一样用法律维权，跟在美国一样，他在日本那边也得到了完全的监护权。他跑去华盛顿抗议政策，还求助于一个致力于解救被拐卖儿童，把他们带回合法父母身边的组织：“带受拐儿童回家”（BAC Home）。当一名调查员认为他找到了我哥的儿子，我哥飞去日本以为会迎来期待已久的团聚，结果发现那不是他的儿子。整个过程花费的成本太大了，消耗着他的生命，而且最糟糕的是他精神奔溃了，这令我非常难过。因为日本在家庭法律上的执行不力，我哥已经七年没有见过他的儿子或跟他讲过话了。典型的日本离婚案就是这样：孩子归母亲，父亲离开。我哥跟这类离婚案里的父亲不一样，但也于事无补。

I hope to see my nephew again. His name is Atomu Morehouse we all called him Mochi. His kidnappers name is Michiyo “Chi” Imoto.

我很想再见到我的侄子。他的名字是阿童木·莫尔豪斯（Atomu Morehouse），我们都叫他Mochi（糯米团）。绑架他的人叫Michiyo “Chi” Imoto（井本智三千代）。



His hair is lighter and finer than his peers in Japan. As it's been 7 years I don't know what he looks like today but this picture is my favorite. He was very proud of his Lego skills.

他的发色比日本同龄小孩更浅，发丝更细。因为已经过了七年了，我不知道他现在长什么样，这张是我最喜欢的他的照片。他对自己的乐高技能很是自豪呢。

-------------译者：兜兜风ddf-审核者：hht288------------

Jean-Christophe Terrillon May 3, 2017
It seems that many people who commented on this particular answer do not have a very clear and precise idea about what happens in Japan when a husband and wife divorce. Usually, yes, the mother has custody of the child. Yes, the father usually not only does not (cannot) see his child again, but he usually has to pay monthly support to his ex-wife, including eventually some additional financial support for the child’s education if the child attends a private school. As a divorced foreigner who has been living in Japan for 23 years, I have gone through divorce procedures in family court, and was told upfront by my lawyer as soon as the proceedings began to forget about custody on my side and even visitation rights. In fact, a new law proposed by the ex-prime minister of Japan Koizumi forces divorced men to give 50% of their pension and retirement money to their ex-wife in addition to the monthly payment (ironically, Koizumi was divorced from his Japanese wife a long time ago, kept one of their three children, but never got to see the other two children again, and this since… 1982! He himself mentioned to the press that the situation was so hard for him that he would never get married again). I am myself in this situation. For two years, I had absolutely no news from my daughter. It was excruciatingly hard at times. Finally, by some twist of fate, my ex-wife and I became friends, and I have been able to see my daughter regularly since 2 years. Many people tell me how lucky I am, how rare this type of situation is in Japan. I will finish by stating that, until recently, on the Web page of the French Embassy in Tokyo, one could find a warning (in French of course) from the embassy for Frenchmen who wish to marry a Japanese lady. The sentence that amused me a bit was “relations between a man and a woman in Japan are somewhat… prehistoric!”. Not mentioning that, most of the time, marriage is here a financial transaction rather than a love story. Of course, one should not unduly generalize. There are for example mixed marriages between foreigners and Japanese nationals which are wonderful. But it is true that Japan took a long time to ratify The Hague convention, and in fact it has not yet been implemented in most cases. My only advice is: if you are a foreigner and plan to marry a Japanese citizen, be careful! And especially, NEVER divorce!

好像很多评论这的人对于在日本夫妻离婚会发生什么事情，并没有一个非常清楚和确切的概念。通常，是的，母亲拥有孩子的监护权。是的，父亲通常不会（不能）再次见到自己的孩子，但是他通常每个月都要支付抚养费给前妻，包括如果孩子上了私立学校，最终还要为孩子的教育提供一些额外的经济支持。作为一个在日本生活了23年的离异外国人，我在家事法庭办理过离婚手续，被我的律师提前告知过，一旦诉讼开始我的监护权甚至是探视权是被人忘掉的。事实上，日本前首相小泉纯一郎提出了一项新法案：除了每月的抚养费之外，男人还得把他50％的养老金和退休金交给了前妻（具有讽刺意味的是，小泉和他的日本老婆很久之前离了婚，他养了三个孩子中的一个，但是再也看不到另外两个孩子了，从1982年到现在！他自己也向新闻界说过，这种情况对他来说太难受了，他再也不会再婚了）。我自己就是这种情况。两年来，我没有收到一丁点关于女儿的消息。有时候真是磨人令我痛苦极了。最后，由于命运的转折，我前妻和我成为了朋友，从两年前开始我就能定期看到我的女儿了。很多人跟我说我太幸运了，这种情况在日本是非常罕见的。我将以下面的叙述来结束我的话语，直到最近，在法国驻东京大使馆的网页上，可以看到使馆对那些希望跟日本女性结婚的法国人发出的警告（当然是用法语写的）。我被这句话逗笑了：“日本男人和女人之间的关系有点......史前！”更别说大多数时候，婚姻在这里是种金融交易，而并非是浪漫的爱情故事。当然，我们不应该以偏概全。有很多外国人和日本国民之间的美好跨国婚姻事例。但日本批准海牙公约确实花了很长时间，且实际上大部分情况下都还没有实施。我唯一的建议是：如果你是外国人，打算和日本公民结婚，请小心！特别是，千万不要离婚！

Baye McNeil, lives in Japan Answered Apr 27, 2017
Here’s a conversation I had with a Japanese private student that illustrates one of the things I dislike about life in Japan.

我和一位日本私立学校的学生进行了一次对话，这个例子说明了一些我不喜欢的有关日本生活的事情。

It took place a few years back but it’s representative of hundreds of conversations. I’ve found in 13 years here that this, above all, is the mentality one has to be tolerant of to a certain extent if one chooses to live here, which I do.

它发生在几年前，但它代表了数百个与此有关的对话。我以在这呆了13年的经验告诉你，如果有谁像我一样选择住这，他就必须学会忍受。

The conversation took place in an AC-free pavilion in Yokohama. I was eating an ice cream to cool down.

谈话发生在横滨一个没有空调的展示馆里。我当时在吃冰淇淋降温。

-------------译者：兜兜风ddf-审核者：hht288------------

Me: This is good!

我：这味道很棒！

Student: Is it sweet enough?

学生：它够甜吗?

Me: Yeah, it's fine. Why, is this diet ice cream or something?

我：是的，它够甜。为什么这么问？它是健怡冰淇淋什么的吗？

Student: (he laughs) No, but American ice cream is sweeter than Japanese ice cream, so I thought—

学生：（他笑了）不，因为美国的冰淇淋总是比日本的甜，所以我以为（你觉得味道不够甜）…

Me: Is that a fact? I hadn't noticed. Tastes the same to me.

我：那是真的吗？我从没注意到这点。对我来说味道是一样的。

Student: I see. And it's much smaller than American ice cream, too, I think.

学生：哦，我明白了。而且我觉得它也比美国的冰淇淋小。

Me: Have you gone to America recently, or something?

我：你是最近有去过美国这样吗？

Student: Not recently. I went to Hawaii five years ago. But, everybody knows—

学生：不是最近。我五年前去过夏威夷。但是这是所有人都知道的事.....

Me: I have an idea. Let's try something different for today's lesson.

我：我有个主意。今天的课我们来试点不一样的东西吧。

Student: Sure.

学生：好的。

Me: Let's talk about similarities.

我：让我们来谈谈相似点。

Student: Similarities?

学生：相似点？

Me: Yeah, you know, things that Japanese people have in common with other people of the world. Or even things that are the same in Yokohama as they are in New York. Stuff like that.

我：是的，你懂得，就是日本人与世界其他人的共同之处。或者说甚至有些在横滨的东西跟其在纽约的都是一样的。像这样的东西。

Student: I don't understand.

学生：我不太明白。

Me: Ummmm…for example, the McDonald's menu is basically the same here in Yokohama as it is in NY.

我：嗯......例如，横滨的麦当劳菜单和纽约的麦当劳菜单基本相同。

Student: American hamburger is bigger than Japanese hamburger.

学生：美国汉堡包比日本汉堡包大。

Me: —

我：……

Student: Deshou?

学生：不是吗（でしょう）？

Me: Ok. How about rice? Back in the States my family ate rice all the time. And Japanese people eat a lot of rice too, right? That is one clear cut—

我：好吧。那大米呢？在美国，我家吃的一直是米饭。然后日本人也吃了很多大米，对吧？这是一个明确的切入点.....

Student: American rice is dry, and a little hard, I remember. Japanese rice is moist and delicious—-

学生：我记得美国的大米是干的，有点硬。而日本的米饭则软润美味。

Me: Ok, Starbucks! Starbucks is essentially the same in both cities; I think we can agree on that. Coffee is coffee. So that would be an example—

我：好吧，那我们来说星巴克！星巴克在这两个城市里基本相同；我认为我们可以就此达成一致意见。咖啡就是咖啡。所以这将是一个例子.......

Student: The cup size is different. Japanese large size is a small size in America. I think

学生：杯子的大小不同。我认为日本的大杯在美国里是小杯。

Me: I don't think so.

我：我不这么认为。

Student: I could not drink the whole cup of coffee. It was too big!

学生：我整杯咖啡都喝不完。太大杯了！

Me: —

我：……

Student: Americans like everything too big deshou?

学生：美国人喜欢一切都是大码的，不是吗？

Me: I think you're missing the…ok, ok, I have a nose and you have a nose, right? Both our noses serve the same purpose, right? This would be an example of a similarity.

我：我想你遗漏了...好吧，好吧，我有一个鼻子，你也有一个鼻子，对吧？我们的鼻子都是同样的作用，对吧？这将是一个举证相似点的例子。

Student: (Studying my nose) —

学生：(研究我的鼻子）......

Me: Since I've been living here, most Japanese people I know will make a point of noting the differences between things here and things in other countries, but no one ever mentions the similarities.

我：自从我住在这里以后，我认识的大多数日本人都会强调自己注意到在日本和其他国家的事物之间的区别，但没人提到过这种相似之处。

Student: I see.

学生：哦，我懂了。

Me: When people constantly point out the differences, It feels almost like you're isolated, like you’re being pushed away. You know? I mean, imagine two countries negotiating peace when they can't find any common ground.

我：当人们不断指出不同之处时，感觉就像你被孤立一样，就像你被推开一样。你懂吗？我的意思是，想象一下，两个国家在找不到任何共同点的时候该如何进行和平谈判呢。

Student: Hmm…I think I understand.

学生：嗯......我想我明白了。

Me: Great. So, can you think of a similarity?

我：太好了。那么，你能想到什么相似点吗？

Student: — (silence for 20 seconds)

学生：.....（沉默20秒）

Me: Just one thing…anything’ll do.

我：只要一点就好......啥都行。

Student: — (another 30 seconds)

学生：......（又沉默了30秒）

Me: Anything!

我：什么点都行！

-------------译者：龙腾翻译总管-审核者：龙腾翻译总管------------
 
By no means do I mean to paint all Japanese people with this brush but it is a mentality you’re likely to run into on a daily basis if you interact with the people here regularly as I do.

我绝不是一概而论说所有的日本人都是这样的，但如果你像我一样经常同这里的人打交道的话，这种心态你可能每天都会有。

Even from some of the Japanese people I know that have spent time abroad somehow they’ve managed to reinforce this predisposition rather than challenge it.

即使是我认识的一些曾在国外呆过一段时间的日本人，不知何故，他们不但没有改变（这种偏见）反而变本加厉。

And to be fair there are A LOT of non-Japanese here that feed and reinforce this notion rather than challenge it (I think for the sole purpose of assimilating into the culture a bit more comfortably than those of us who choose to push back against it). They wittingly or unwittingly cosign this urban legend-like fallacy that Japan (and Japanese people and virtually all things Japanese) are unique in the world and distinctive from everything and everyone beyond their borders.

说句良心话，这里有很多非日本人都被灌输和强化这一观念，而不是去反驳它（我认为目的只有一个，那就是将其融合进日本文化比我们选择抵制它更容易让人接受）。他们有意或无意地传播有关日本的荒谬都市传说那就是日本（和日本人以及一切的日本事物）在世上是独一无二的，与世间的所有人和物都界限分明各不相同。

The best (and most popular response) I’ve gotten from my Japanese brethren and sisthren as to why this idea is so prent is generally something along the lines of “Similarities are boring. Differences are interesting. We seek difference.”I get that.

关于这种想法为什么如此普遍的提问，我从我日本的男女同胞中得到的最好回应（最普遍的回应）通常是这么几句“相同点太无聊了。之间的不同点却很有趣。我们寻求差异。”我明白（他们为什么会这么想），我都懂。

But I think the world could be a much better place if people were more inclined to seek out commonalities as well for a change rather than the things that fuel division. Because even though this is often done here innocently with the most benign intentions the results — as I explained to my student — can often be or appear to be malignant.

但我认为当人们寻求彼此的共同点，愿意改变那些会导致分歧的事物，世界会变得更美好。因为尽管这里的人们常无意识地怀最大的善意做出这种事，结果——正如我解释给我学生的那样——往往变成或是出现恶果。

For an adherence to this kind of thinking generally manifests itself in certain behaviors. Granted some of these behaviors are constructive but most are at best hindrances to the kind of global welcoming atmosphere many people here would swear is a Japanese genetic trait and their utmost desire.…just saying

对于这种思维想法的固执己见通常表现在某些行为上。当然，其中有些行为是具有建设性作用的，但大多数妨碍建立欢迎世界的友好氛围，这里的许多人敢起誓说这是日本人的基因遗传特性和其极度的渴望（所导致的）…就这么一说。

Chloe Lorenson lived in North London upxed Aug 30
Not something I don’t like but something I don’t get.

不是我不喜欢（日本和日本人）的一点，而是我搞不懂的一点。



My time in Korea China and Japan taught me that youthful and childlike innocent appearance is desirable in South East Asia. Their makeup trends and attire have an evident influence over that. A lot of those trends like BB creams and straight brows personally suit me very well. In conjunction I understand the popularity of cosmetic surgeries to attain bigger breasts sharper facial features lighter skin etc. Yet I couldn’t comprehend the popularity of this crooked teeth trend among Japanese people.

我在韩国、中国和日本待的这些时日里，我学会了一点那就是在东南亚青春活力和如孩童般天真无邪的外表是性感值得拥有的。这一点对他们的化妆趋势和着装有着明显的影响。有很多这样的趋势，比如BB霜和很适合我的直眉。同时，我了解到了整容手术的普及，隆胸、削脸和美白肌肤等等。但是，我还是无法理解日本人这种不整齐牙齿的流行趋势。

I was too afraid to ask someone directly during my time in the country of the fear of offending. Could a native Japanese help me understand this trend?

在我待在日本的时候，因怕得罪冒犯到别人所以我不敢问。有哪个土生土长的日本人能帮我解释这种流行趋势吗？

-------------译者：HFH-审核者：HFH------------

Miki Ohara lives in Tokyo upxed Dec 13；
Japanese supremacy mindset is so widespread even if hidden at first it is there and I hate it.

日本至高无上的心态是如此普遍，以至于它最初没显示出来，但我知道它是存在着的，且我对此很是厌恶。

For example last night I was talking to an entrepreneur who expressed disdain for an American business partner who always wanted to communicate in English even though he had studied Japanese.

例如，昨晚我和一位日本企业家聊天，他对一个一直想用英语交流的美国商业伙伴表示不屑，尽管那个人也学过日语。

According to him this American man couldn't be expected to understand the complexities of Japanese as it is the most sophisticated language in the world and impossible for anyone but Japanese to be able to read the subtle nuances which has to do with the fact that Japan has the most sophisticated culture in the world. So intricate so refined so advanced…

据他所说，这个美国人根本不可能理解不到日语的复杂性，因为日语是世界上最复杂的语言，除了日本人，谁也无法真正读出与日本这个世界上最精致文化有关的微妙含义。因为日语它是如此复杂、如此精炼，如此先进......

Unfortunately I have heard the same thing from countless other Japanese who “lower” themselves when interacting with foreigners. It never fails to make me cringe.

不幸的是，我从也听过无数其他日本人在与外国人交流时”贬低“自身说出如上相同的言论。它从未让我有所畏惧感到难堪过。

I'm not sure why but a good amount of Japanese feel that the English language is inferior and overly simple and that there are no complexities no honoriffics or polite tactful ways of speaking while Japanese is ultra complex elegant and graceful. I am always stunned at the pride people have.

我不知道为什么，但很多日本人觉得英语是低劣的，过于简单，不具复杂性，没有自谦尊称、礼貌及委婉的说话方式而日语却是如此复杂、文雅而又飘逸。我总是对人们的自傲感到惊讶。

I try to remind Japanese who say such things that other languages are also sophisticated and have delicate nuances and tricky idioms phrases etc. and that they may not realize it but they are also being looked down on when they butcher those languages. Have some shame.

我试着提醒说这种话的日本人，其他语言也很复杂，有微妙的细微差别和精妙的成语，短语等，而他们可能没有意识到当他们污蔑其他语言的时候，他们也正被人看不起。人啊，要有点羞耻心。

Eric Barnes USMC 5 years Lives in Tokyo Former Bodyguard ProKickboxerupxed Apr 22 2017
I HATE “Syouganai”.

我讨厌“Syouganai”(しょうがない，意思是"没办法")。



Not dislike or find it annoying hate it.

不是说我不喜欢或觉得它恼人，我是厌恶它。

For anyone who doesn’t know  “しょうがない”(sho-ga-nai) it basically means “It can’t be helped”.

对于不知道“しょうがない”一词意思的人，它基本上是说“没办法了，于事无补了”。

Now there are some things in life that really are syouganai.

好比，生活中有些事确实是让人无可奈何毫无办法。

“Oh look it’s snowing today. Syouganai.”
“I broke my leg riding a unicycle and now it’s in a cast. Syouganai.”

”哦，看，今天下雪了。真没办法啊。”

“我在骑独轮车的时候摔断了腿，只好给它打上石膏了。真没办法啊。”

Then some things aren’t truly syouganai but it’s reasonable to say it.

然而，有些东西不是真的“没办法”但这么说也是合理的。

“I’m working tomorrow so I can’t go to your party. Syouganai.”
“I fell asleep reading that book. Syouganai.”

”我明天要上班，所以去不了你的派对。真没办法啊。”

“我读那本书竟然读到睡着了。真是没办法啊。”

-------------译者：smileREGENT-审核者：hht288------------

However the problem is that many Japanese use this as an all purpose excuse to let things slide avoid doing the work avoid going after their dreams and remaining in a bad situation.

然而问题在于，许多日本人将此作为万金油般的借口，用它来逃避工作，放弃逐梦，“心安理得”地待在一个的糟糕处境。

I will give some examples.

这里，我会给出一些例子：

（1）Takeshi-san hates his job. The company hates him as well and has kicked him off the sales team and has moved him to sales support. He literally has no work to do and they are forcing him to see a therapist. His boss has claimed Takeshi is mentally ill. They are simply trying to make him quit. He speaks four languages and is highly intelligent. Takeshi could just QUIT the job and get a new one. But instead he has stayed at the job for years because “Syouganai it’s my company.” No Takeshi you could QUIT and find a NEW company and stop being a miserable whiny loser. It isn’t Syouganai.

（1）北野君讨厌他的工作。公司也讨厌他并把他踢出销售组，扔到了销售助理组。他们还逼促几乎无事可做的他去看心理医生。他老板声称北野有心理疾病，然而他们只是想让北野自动辞职。北野，一位掌握四门语言的高智商人才，完全可以辞掉这份工作找个新的。然而数年来他困居在此，仅因为：“真是没办法啊，谁让这是我的公司呢。”而留了下来。不，北野，你完全可以踢开这个公司找份新工作，别再当个满腹牢骚的输家。现实远非无法可想。

（2）Rie-san is 42 pretty divorced and her kids are young adults now. She’s feeling lonely. She works a lot and all her co-workers are much older. She says she can’t meet a man for a relationship. “Syouganai I just have to endure being lonely.” NO you can actually TRY to meet someone. Plan days to go out and make a conscious effort to talk to new people while out. It is a choice you can make Rie-san. It isn’t Syouganai.

（2）梨绘女士，今年42岁，长相漂亮，离异，孩子已经成年。然而她时常感到寂寞。她工作繁忙且同事年纪都大她很多。她觉得自己不可能再邂逅一位男士展开一段新的恋情。“没办法了，我注定要孤独地生活下去。”不，你完全可以试着寻找一位新的理想伴侣，出去走走，尝试邂逅些新的朋友。梨绘，给你自己一个机会，现实并非无法可想。

（3）Michiko-san dreams of living in America. She has visited many times but now wants to live there. She speaks English well has saved money but although she applied for a green card she was denied. “Syouganai. I will have to settle for living in Japan.” No Michiko-san you can apply for a green card AGAIN. You can find work with a company which will help you handle your visa issues. You can even marry someone who has a green card or is an American which seems reasonable and then you could live there with your spouse. It isn’t Syouganai

.（3）美智子梦想移民生活在美国。她已经去过美国很多次了，但现在想在那里定居下来。她英语说得不错，有足够的储蓄，不过，她第一次申请绿卡失败了。“没办法了，我只能永远在日本凑合过下去了。”不，美智子，你完全可以再次申请绿卡。你可以同移民公司合作来解决各种签证问题，甚至，你可以找个持绿卡者或者合适的美国人结婚，然后和伴侣一起定居美国。现实还未到无法可想的地步。

Syouganai is used as a catch-all cop-out for people to quit trying and allow themselves to sit stewing in the same tepid pot of piss they are miserable in on a day-to-day basis. It is a cultural glitch which stops people from actually improving their lot in life.

“无法可想”是个蹩脚的万金油借口，被人们用来逃避尝试，用来说服自己继续坐立不安地忍受悲惨现实的借口。这是个文化问题，它阻碍着人们提高自己的生活质量。

I hate it passionately.

我对此感到深恶痛绝。

I implore you all and Japan: Just say NO to Syouganai. Let’s fix this shit.

我恳请你们，所有的日本人，请停止说别无它法了（仕様がない， 无法可想）。让我们试着解决这个问题。