某女的使命是为揭露中国“严酷而残忍”的婚姻市场——秘密录像显示中国很多父母思想依旧过时 [美国媒体]

-------------译者：yuebob-审核者：龙腾翻译总管------------



The day Chinese photographer Guo Yingguang went to the “marriage market” in downtown Shanghai last summer looking for dates she was constantly asked one question: “How old are you?”

去年夏天，中国摄影师郭盈光去上海市中心的“相亲角（婚姻市场）”找对象时，常被问到同一个问题：“你多大了？“

Guo was 34 and many parents who regularly flock to the famous People’s Park venue during weekends looking for a partner for their grown-up children viewed her as way too old. 

郭今年34岁，在很多经常在周末到着名的人民公园为他们的成年子女寻对象的父母眼中，她太老了。

One middle-aged man even compared her to property claiming she was like a nice house in the countryside with an attractive look but too aged.

一个中年男人甚至将她比作房产，声称她像漂亮的郊区房，户型不错，但太老旧了。

Guo filmed some of the comments from parents with a hidden camera and the video was later watched more than 14 million times on Chinese social media.

郭用隐藏摄像头拍下了一些父母的评论，该视频随后在中国社交媒体上被观看了1400万多次。

One man was filmed telling Guo: “What’s the use of her getting a master's degree? A bachelor’s is more than enough. Just like the old saying goes ‘a woman’s virtue lies in her lack of talent’.” Guo had written an advert mentioning she had a master’s degree after studying in London prompting the scornful remark from the man.  

（视频中）被拍到的一名男子对郭说：“她获得硕士学位有什么用？学士学位就够了。就像俗话说的，‘女人无才便是德。’”郭提前为自己写好了一个相亲广告，提到她在伦敦学习后取得了硕士学位，这引起了那名男子的嘲讽。



“I stood there and listened to them talking about me. I felt the world was too harsh and too cruel. In their world view I’m worthless” Guo said.

“我站在那里听他们谈论着我。我觉得这个世界太严酷、太残忍了。在他们的世界观中，我一文不值。”郭说。



Her experiences at the marriage market also led Guo to produce a series of photographs and art projects centred on topics including planned marriage and “leftover women” a derogatory term in China used to describe single women in their late 20s and 30s.

她在“相亲角”的经历也导致郭制作了一系列的照片和艺术项目，主题聚焦在包办婚姻和“剩女”上；“剩女”一词在中国是一个贬义词，用来描述20多岁30出头还单身的女性。

She visited the marriage market more than 10 times over two years and produced a book of photographs titled The Bliss of Conformity.

两年来，她走访了“相亲角”10多次，并制作了一组名为《顺从的幸福》的摄影作品。

The work shows images of the serene natural environment in the park juxtaposed with pictures of frowning middle-aged men and women clutching adverts to show off their children to prospective dates. 

这部作品并列展示了在公园里宁静的自然环境下一些皱着眉头的中年男女，他们拿着自己子女的相亲广告向有可能的结婚对象炫耀着自己的孩子。



 -------------译者：yuebob-审核者：龙腾翻译总管------------

Guo’s work encapsulates the clash between two drastically different outlooks on marriage and women in China with one rooted in the belief that women need to get married in order to achieve happiness while the other is built on the premise that women can create their own rewarding and fulfilling lives. 

郭的作品体现了中国两种截然不同的婚姻观、女性价值观之间的剧烈冲突，其中一种根深蒂固的观点是女性需要结婚才能获得幸福，而另一种则建立这种前提之下，即女性能创造出她们个人有价值、有成就感的生活。

Guo’s video struck an emotional chord among the country’s increasingly educated well-travelled and financially independent women who believe they do not have to be in the marriage market and that their worth is not defined by their age.

郭的视频在越来越多受到良好教育、游历广泛、经济独立的中国女性中引起了情感共鸣，她们认为自己不必进入婚姻市场，她们的价值并不取决于她们的年龄。

One internet user commenting on Guo’s work on social media said: “Older people don’t get this concept even after living their whole life – everyone is an individual and a marriage resulting from conformity will never be happy.”

一位网友在评论郭在社交媒体上的作品时说：“老辈的人估计一生都不会懂这种观念——那就是每个人都是一个独立的个体、顺从（父母）而成就的婚姻永远都不会幸福。”

Guo worked for China Daily and Reuters as a photojournalist before she decided to study arts in London at the age of 30.

郭曾在《中国日报》和《路透社》担任摄影记者，30岁时，她决定到伦敦学习艺术。



Her boyfriend had just broken up with her after a nine-year relationship and Guo felt miserable about herself.

在相恋九年的男朋友刚和她分手时，郭感到很痛苦（觉得自己完蛋了）。

“I lay on my bed for several days staring at the ceiling and thinking my life was over” Guo said.
She finally realised that the end of the relationship meant she was free to pursue other ambitions.
She improved her English and managed to get an offer to study in London for two years.

郭说：“我在床上躺了好几天，盯着天花板，想着我的人生这下是玩完了。”她最后意识到，这段感情的结束意味着她可以自由地去追求其他梦想。她提高了自己的英语水平，并设法得到了在伦敦学习两年的机会。

Guo was inspired in the British capital by the bold and free-spirited women she met and gained the confidence to step up against conventional Chinese values.

郭在英国首都受到了她遇到的那些大胆、自由奔放的女性的鼓舞，并获得了与中国传统价值观相抗衡的信心。

“The women I was close to all chose not to get married including my mentor and other female classmates” Guo said. 

郭说，“我身边的女性都选择不结婚，包括我的导师和其他女同学们。”

“For example one of my classmates is a retired dentist who is over 60 years old. After graduating she studied at another arts programme in Cuba. I admire her so much” she said.

郭说，“例如，我的一个同学是一位退休牙医，她已经60多岁了。毕业后，她在古巴的另一个艺术课程中学习。我非常钦佩她。”

“I want to let more women know that you don’t have to care about what others think and you have the right to live out your own life. The only one who can judge us is ourselves.”

“我想让更多的女性知道，你不必在乎别人的想法，你有权过自己的生活，唯一能评判我们的就是我们自己。“


-------------译者：yuebob-审核者：龙腾翻译总管------------

–]Yuan_Anxiong 28 指标 2 天前 
Expose? We all know. If you want to protest this tradition then just don't get married and do what you want in life. Middle-class women have access to education and job opportunities in the PRC. Your life has meaning outside of marriage.

曝光？我们都知道。如果你想抗议这个传统，那就别结婚，去做你想做的事。在中国，中产阶级女性有受教育和就业的机会。你的生活意义不止婚姻这一点。

[–]barryhakker 2 指标 1 天前 
I think the point here isn't that life outside marriage has meaning (although it does) the point is the unfair categorization of women who want to focus on more than just being wives and mums as "unwanted". The big change here should be that educated women who had or have a career are just as precious as career moms.

我认为这里的重点并不是婚姻之外的生活有意义(尽管它确实有意义)，关键是将那些不想仅仅做妻子和妈妈的女性归类为“不受欢迎”是不公平的。这里最大的改变应该是，曾经拥有或拥有职业生涯的、受过良好教育的女性，就像全职妈妈一样是宝贵的。

We all know that the cultural revolution generation is deeply entrenched in their world view so no point trying to change them...

我们都知道文化大革命那一代人的世界观根深蒂固，所以没必要试图改变他们...

[–]Yuan_Anxiong 12 指标 1 天前 
But attraction can't be forced. She could launch a multi-million-yuan campaign to illuminate the virtues of older educated experienced women but if the men aren't attracted then they just aren't. Personally I do favour a woman who is highly educated and intelligent but also young. Unfortunately no one is entitled to be 'wanted'. An educated older woman who says 'I worked hard in school and in my career! Why don't you want me?!' is like the fabled 'nice guy' who proclaims 'I'm so nice to you and buy you so many things with my hard-earned wealth! Why don't you want me?!'.

但（两性间的）吸引力是没法强迫的。她可以发起一场数百万元的宣传活动，来说明年纪大的、受过教育、经验丰富的女性们的优点，但如果男性没有被吸引，那么就真是她们没魅力。就我个人而言，我确实偏爱一个受过高等教育、聪明但又年轻的女人。不幸的是，没有人有一定会被男人“众星捧月”般追求的权利。一位受过教育的年长女性说：“我在学校和事业上都很努力！你为什么不想要我？！”就像传说中的“好男人”，他说“我对你那么好，用我辛苦挣来的钱给你买了这么多东西！你为什么不想要我？！”

[–]barryhakker 2 指标 1 天前 
I agree that attraction can't and shouldn't be forced. Problem in China is that in reality the parents play a huge role in their kid's partner sextion as is demonstrated by the fact that many of the children being "marketed" aren't even aware of it.

我同意（两性间的）吸引力不能也不应该被强迫。中国的问题在于，在现实中，父母在子女的伴侣选择中扮演着重要的角色，事实证明，许多被父母“包办婚姻”的子女甚至都没有意识到这一点。

[–]Yuan_Anxiong 3 指标 1 天前 
Well traditionally most cultures treated marriage as a unx of families rather than individuals. Marrying for love is an exception to the rule in most civilisations and rather recent.

嗯，传统上，大多数文化把婚姻看作是家庭而不是个人的结合。为了爱而结婚是大多数文明中的例外，而且是最近才出现的。

[–]dcrmGreat Britain 4 指标 1 天前 
There was no discrimination against her in that video for being educated or having a career though the exact opposite in fact. She was praised for having a good education and being talented (which is further than I'd have gone). Different problems exist for different genders and one of the ones for females is getting education a career started and a home before you reach a certain age.

在视频中，她并没有因为受过教育或有职业而受到歧视，事实恰恰相反。她因受过良好的教育和才华横溢而受到赞扬(这已经比我走的更远了)。不同的性别存在着不同的问题，女性面临的问题之一就是在你达到一定年龄之前有受过教育、开始了职业生涯和建立了家庭。

You can always go out and get an educated after you have a baby it's not so easy to reverse your body clock. I really want to see a list of men who want to date dumb poor women with a horrible career. I think the list would be pretty small. This is purely about age discrimination in a martial setting and I'm not about to call someone a horrible person for not wanting to date people of a certain age.

生完孩子后，你总是可以出去再接受教育，调转你的生物钟可不容易。我真的很想看到一张那些想要跟事业糟糕、愚蠢贫穷的女人约会的男人名单。我觉得这名单会很短。这纯粹是军事环境设定下的年龄歧视，我不会因为某人不想和某个年龄的人约会而称他为一个可怕的人。

-------------译者：yuebob-审核者：龙腾翻译总管------------

[–]kulio_forever 3 指标 1 天前 
“You can always go out and get an educated after you have a baby”
In China? Do tell! Hope you mean some crafts or something the schools are basically off limits technically she can "self-study" but access is not particularly good.

“生完孩子后，你总是可以出去再接受教育。”
在中国？不见得吧！希望你指的是一些手工艺什么的，学校基本上是不可能的，技术上她可以“自学”，但效果不是特别好。

[–]barryhakker 3 指标 1 天前 
I saw the video a few days earlier on Wechat and I distinctly recall someone saying "a virtuous woman is uneducated" or something of the sorts. Perhaps I remembered wrong.

几天前，我在微信上看到了这段视频，我清楚地记得有人说过“女子无才便是德”之类的话。也许我记错了。

[–]stealmyrecords 2 指标 1 天前 
You'd be surprised - the typical Chinese male actually does prefer women who are less intelligent and accomplished than they are as long as they're young and pretty. The Chinese word for "flower vase" is also used as a slang term to describe these girls - pretty on the outside empty on the inside.
Source: multiple male Chinese coworkers/friends asking me for my opinion on what makes a woman suitable and then offering their opinion in return. Needless to say our opinions...differed.

你会感到惊讶的——典型的中国男性实际上更喜欢没那么聪明和成功的女性，只要她们年轻漂亮就行。“花瓶”这个词也被用作俚语来形容这类女孩——她们外表漂亮，却没什么内在文学修养。资料来源：多位中国男性同事/朋友问我什么样的女人才是合适称心的，然后他们也提出了自己的意见。不用说，我们的意见...各不相同。

[–]kulio_forever 1 指标 1 天前 
Finding a girl who will keep quiet while you enjoy life ain't easy

找一个在你享受生活的同时保持安静的女孩并不容易。

[–]kulio_forever 1 指标 1 天前 
The government is doing that not the people. "Leftover" is a term made by state media they are very proud of their creation I believe.

政府是这样做的，而不是人民。“剩女”是由官方媒体炮制的，我相信他们对自己的创造很是自豪。

[–]kulio_forever 1 指标 1 天前 
expose=write about which is forbidden and she is risking her freedom

曝光=写下那些被禁止的（话题），她在拿她的自由冒风险。

[–]Yuan_Anxiong 2 指标 1 天前 
It's forbidden to write about Chinese marriage traditions? I seriously doubt that.

禁止写中国的婚姻传统？我严重怀疑这点。

-------------译者：sdent41-审核者：龙腾翻译总管------------

[–]kulio_forever 1 指标 1 天前 
Its permitted to talk openly about society's problems? Since when?
Remember those 5 university girls? What happened when they wanted to inform people about groping on buses?

中国开始允许人们公开谈论社会问题了？从什么时候开始的？还记得那五个女大学生嘛?当她们想告诉公交车上的人们有色狼时发生了什么？

That's right they were seized by the police and threatened into silence. Or did you somehow forget that?

没错，她们被警察抓走，被威胁保持沉默。还是你们把这件事忘了？

[–]Yuan_Anxiong 2 指标 1 天前 
The CCP censors things that are anti-government. The CCP didn't invent those marriage traditions and Mao himself even actively destroyed a lot of aspects of traditional Chinese culture including many of the gender roles. There is no reason for the government to censor a woman who complains about Chinese marriage traditions that predate the CCP by thousands of years. It just doesn't add up at all. The government and China itself are two different things. If anything the CCP would SUPPORT her call for women to be better educated and have better careers if historical patterns are any indication. It's the old-school Chinese traditionalists who would attempt to silence her if anyone.

GC党会审查反ZF行为。这些婚姻传统不是GC党制造推行的，M主席也毁掉了中国传统文化的很多方面，包括男女性别角色。ZF不会因为一个女人抱怨早于GC党千年之前就存在的中国传统婚姻文化而审查她。
这根本就说不通。政府和中国本身是两种截然不同的事物。如果有历史迹象表明的话，甚至还不如说GC党是支持她呼吁女性接受更良好的教育，有更好的职业生涯。要说有谁想让她保持缄默的话也就是那些保守的中国传统主义者了吧。

[–]FileError214 1 指标 1 天前 
“The CCP censors things that are anti-government.”
Do you think that’s a good approach just censoring everything that goes against the Party narrative? Without criticism and self-reflection how can anyone ever improve?
If I’m doing something wrong I hope someone will tell me. Then I can take steps to be better. If nobody ever tells me what I’m doing wrong how can I take steps to be better?
“GC党会审查反ZF行为。”

你觉得审查所有反ZF的言论是个好办法？不接受指责与自我反省，怎么能提高自身水平？如果我某事做错了，我希望有人能帮我指出来。然后我就能采取措施做到更好。如果没人告诉我我做错了，我又怎么提升自己？

[–]Yuan_Anxiong 1 指标 1 天前 
No I don't believe that censoring anti-government sentiments is a good approach and thank heavens I'm on the other side of that bamboo curtain for that reason alone. That doesn't mean that The Party censors EVERYthing negative about China as a concept. The CCP loves destroying traditional Chinese culture remember? This woman is helping them if anything.

不，我不觉得审查反ZF情绪是个好方法，而且感谢上帝我不在那落后的竹幕国家里。这并不意味着GC党以审查所有有关中国负面的事物为理念。GC党喜欢摧毁中国传统文化，还记得吗？不如说这位女士是在帮助他们。

[–]FileError214 1 指标 1 天前 
The CCP loves destroying “traditional Chinese culture”? Maybe 50 years ago. These days they’re a lot more pragmatic. Culture that threatens the Party will be destroyed culture that supports the Party will be supported. That’s all the CCP cares about - retaining power whatever the cost.

GC党喜欢摧毁“中国传统文化”？50年前也许是这样。现在他们则更务实。威胁到党的文化会被摧毁，支持党的文化会保留。这就是GC党所在意的——不惜一切代价也要留住自己的权力。

[–]Yuan_Anxiong 1 指标 1 天前 
I agree and thus a woman promoting better education and jobs for women in China in no way shape or form threatens the CCP.

我同意，一个呼吁推进让中国女性接受更好教育有更好工作机会的女人是根本不可能影响或威胁到GC党的。

-------------译者：sdent41-审核者：龙腾翻译总管------------

[–]FileError214 1 指标 1 天前 
And yet how do you think the CCP will react to her growing popularity?
By supporting her? By ignoring her? Or by convicting her on charges of “spreading rumors that harm national stability”?

然而你觉得GC党对她的爆红会怎么反应？支持她？无视她？还是指控她“散布危害国家稳定的流言”？

[–]kulio_forever 0 指标 1 天前 
She will be treated just like those girls were treated mark it
Hopefully she is in HK

相信我，她会遭受到和公车里那些女大学生们一样的对待。真希望她是在香港。

[–]Yuan_Anxiong 1 指标 1 天前 
Perhaps but not by the government.

也许吧，但不会是被ZF威胁。

[–]kulio_forever 1 指标 1 天前 
Local police are the government guy you seem to be deep in denial

当地警察就是ZF的人，你似乎在矢口否认事实。

[–]Yuan_Anxiong 1 指标 1 天前 
Why the hell would local police care that some woman wants to break marriage matchmaking traditions? That's not even a government affair. It just doesn't make sense to posit such a thing.

为毛当地警察会在意几个想打破婚姻市场传统的女人啊？这又不是政务。假设这种事没有任何意义。

[–]KoKanseiJapan -1 指标 1 天前 
Not sure if only having a high-flying career is a substitute for having a real family with real children whether you are a man or woman but especially if you are a woman. There's a reason the "unhappy cat lady" stereotype exists IMHO.

不论你是男性还是女性，特别如果你是女性的话，我不确定只有个成功的事业是否能代替你有个真正的家庭和孩子。恕我直言，“悲伤的猫女士”刻板印象的存在是有原因的。

[–]Yuan_Anxiong 4 指标 1 天前 
Then I guess try to find a husband? The thing is no one owes her marriage any more than she owes anyone else marriage. If most Chinese men aren't into 'older' women then they just aren't. Pushing them into it simply won't work any more than pushing a woman to marry a poor man who isn't at fault for being poor.

那我猜她应该找个丈夫？问题是没人理应娶她，她也不是理应要嫁某人才行。如果大多数中国男性不喜欢“年纪大点”的女人，他们是不会和这些女人结婚的。强迫他们在一起是没用的，就像你强迫女生嫁给一个家境贫穷的男生一样。

[–]KoKanseiJapan 3 指标 1 天前 
Agree completely. Nature and the natural order cannot be subverted so matter how "unfair" it may seem.

完全同意。不论多不“公平”，自然和自然规则是无法被推翻的。

[–]wzyguy 5 指标 1 天前 
Why is she making a fuss? Her problem is she doesn’t want to lower her standards. There are 30 plus million poor rural Chinese guys she wouldn’t even consider. She is a highly educated woman who is in denial about her age. No you can’t have your cake and eat it to..

她为啥要整这么一出？她的问题是她不肯降低她的择偶标准。有3千多万的农村男性她根本连考虑都不会考虑。她是个受过高等教育却否认自己年龄的女性。要知道鱼与熊掌不能兼得啊......

-------------译者：梧桐pasky-审核者：龙腾翻译总管------------

[–]Runawaylawnmower 1 指标 1 天前 
I would rather never get married than lower my standards so I can't blame her for not doing the same. Also pretty interesting that you said that when she didn't reject any potential candidate the whole point of this was that they rejected her simply because of her age and education.

我宁愿不结婚也不愿意和低于我标准的人结婚，所以我不能责怪她做了换做是我我也会做的事情。另外很有趣的是，你说她在没有拒绝任何潜在结婚候选人的时候，她却仅仅因为其年龄和学历就被草草拒绝了。

[–]wzyguy 6 指标 1 天前 
Of course she will get rejected. Being 35 she is obviously shopping out of her league. Like I said she is in denial about her age being a hindrance to what she is looking for. It is also true for men. If you don’t have a decent income a car an apartment paid for in the city. You too will get laughed out of the park.

她当然会被拒绝。35岁的她明显是在超出自己能力的范围内挑选对象。就像我说的那样，她对自己年龄的否认已经阻碍到她寻找真命天子的道路了。男人也是如此，如果你没有一份得体的收入，在这座城市没车没房，你也会在这个“婚姻”公园里出局被人嘲笑。

[–]acjj1990 1 指标 1 天前 
Of course they would her birthing age has passed and gone.
China is big on having a family to carry on your legacy harder to do with a woman who's already at an age where there are higher risk for the child during pregnancy.
Any educated older man will go after the younger woman over her.
This is her throwing a tantrum against the fact of life.

他们当然会拒绝她，她的生育年龄已经过了。中国人很在意有人能将其家族的香火延续下去，而这对一个年龄已处于怀孕会有高风险的女人来说是件不易之事。任何受过教育年龄大点（较成熟）的男人都会去追求一个比她更年轻的女人。她不过是为生活中的事实而耍脾气罢了。
 
[–]solitudeisunderrated 5 指标 1 天前 
She is going to a "marriage market" at 34 years old. What does she expect to hear?
I wonder what the reaction of these leftover women be if an unsuccessful poor and weak man went on a mission to expose China's (or the world's for that matter) "harsh and cruel" marriage/dating market.

她进入“婚姻市场”的时候已经34岁了。她还指望能听到些什么好回应吗？我很好奇这些所谓的“剩女们”在听到一个不仅不成功、还贫穷羸弱的男人揭露出中国（或者世界上的）那些“严峻且残酷”的婚姻/约会市场时会是怎样的反应。

[–]duaki 2 指标 1 天前 
You mean males that aren't: a) 高帅富，doesn't b) own an apartment c) drive a BMW or Mercedes or d) have an annual salary of 6 digits?

你是指那些a)不是高富帅、b)没房、c)：开的不是宝马或奔驰或d)年薪没到六位数的男人吗？

[–]enigma88888 6 指标 2 天前 
This is a little bit absurd. What does she want? You cannot just protest the fact you are unexceptional and too old.

这有点荒谬可笑。她想要的到底是什么？她只是不能接受她平凡还年纪大的事实罢了。

There are countless men who would line up to date her but she doesnt want short fat poor men -- she only wants tall rich and handsome and she is pissed that such people want young hot and fertile girl friends rather than her frumpy self. Tough shit imo.

在我看来，有一大堆的男人愿意排队和她约会，她只是不想和一个矮胖穷的男人约会罢了——她一心只想要个高富帅。同时，她还愤恨那些想要年轻漂亮能生育的女人，而不是土气乏味的她做女朋友的男人。太不像话了。

-------------译者：yuebob-审核者：龙腾翻译总管------------

[–]2gun_cohen 7 指标 1 天前 
On the other hand many Chinese men want 22-24 yo girls who are sexually inexperienced tall slim big b00bs melon seed faces double eyelids and less intelligent than themselves.
Did I forget anything?

另一方面，很多中国男人想要的是年龄在22-24岁、没性经验、个高苗条、胸大瓜子脸、双眼皮和不如自己聪明的年轻女人。我有漏说什么吗？

[–]dcrmGreat Britain 11 指标 1 天前 
How many men bitch about not being able to find 22-24 y/o girls with massive boobs tall slender build on news articles and call it "cruel"? The whole point is it's retarded to complain about it.

有多少男人因找不到22-24岁、胸大苗条的年轻女孩而在新闻报道上抱怨说这（社会对他们）是“残忍”的？重点是抱怨这种事是很愚蠢的行为。

[–]stealmyrecords 3 指标 1 天前 
Insatiable hunger for top-shelf cosmetics/clothing/accessories/electronics

对高级化妆品/服装/配饰/电子产品的极度渴望。

[–]tchrbrianUnited States 2 指标 1 天前 
A non helicopter type future Mother in Law.

一个非直升机型的未来岳母大人。
（直升机型父母是指控制欲很强、处处为孩子着想、不希望孩子受到一丁点儿伤害、意图承包下孩子一生的父母。）

[–]takeitchillish 2 指标 1 天前 
These women's standard is set really high. These women often want a man with a career who earn more money than themselves... Good luck with that in China... Those guys would choose some dumb young girl instead... And those young beautiful girls are standing in line to date men who earn good money in China.

这些女人的择偶标准定得很高，经常想要一个事业成功赚得比自己多的男人...祝你们在中国有好运。那些更愿意选择愚蠢的年轻女孩而不是她们的中国小伙们......和那些排队想要跟收入不菲的男人约会的年轻漂亮的女孩们。

[–]IornukrumGermany 2 指标 1 天前 
Seems like expectations are messed up in Chinese society so few people really know what it takes to find some happiness and content in life.

在中国社会，人们的期望似乎被打乱了，所以很少人知道要怎么做才能在生活中找到幸福和满足。

[–]takeitchillish 1 指标 3小时前 
But that is true in all societies. Women always want to marry men who earn more than them or have a better job even in so called feminine societies like Sweden and Norway.

但在所有社会中都是如此。即使在瑞典和挪威这样的所谓女性社会，女性也总是希望嫁给比她们收入更高或工作更好的男人。
-------------译者：sdent41-审核者：龙腾翻译总管------------

[–]PlueberryBancakes 2 指标 1 天前 
Pretty sure you've wildly missed the point of this video.
It's not that she's dying for a man but can't reconcile her yearning for marriage with her own high standards. It's that she's against the entire system in the first place and how parents maintain so much control over the lives of their children pressuring them to follow a certain path.

我很确定你搞错了这个视频的重点。重点不是她很想找个对象，而是她无法调和自己的高标准和她对婚姻的渴望之间的矛盾。重点是她一开始就反对相亲（这种婚姻配对系统），以及父母们是如何控制自己儿女的生活，强迫他们去走这条路。

[–]dcrmGreat Britain 3 指标 2 天前 
I'm on two sides about this one. On one hand the amount of people giving her derogatory comments when they should just have shut up is obscene (although I can agree with them). On the other hand if dating/marriage were on her priority list then she should have made it a priority shitty life decisions are partly her fault.

这事我正反两方都站。一方面，在评论里贬低她的流氓们应该闭嘴（虽然我可以理解认同他们的观点）。另一方面如果约会/结婚是她优先考虑的事情，那她就应该优先考虑这件事，糟糕的人生决定部分原因是她自己的错。

So long as nobody is being pressured into dating everyone should be free to date who they want and avoid who they don't want to date. Given the fact she went to a "marriage market" at the age of 35 and a thing called fertility exists of course she's going to find it hard to find a partner. Especially since everyone is so much younger than her.

只要没人被强迫相亲，每个人都应能自由约会。鉴于她是35岁去的“相亲市场”，由于生育能力的问题，她想找个伴侣当然会比较困难。特别是其他人都比她年轻得多。

The thing here that is really wrong is it's the parents advertising their children for marriage. The fuck is up with that. If it were the children themselves saying "no thanks you're too old". Then who cares. Who would actually want to marry an relatively old liberal arts student who was okay looking. Age is an important factor especially for women.

父母为他们的子女做婚姻广告这事相当不对。这丫的算个什么事。如果是他们的子女说“不，谢谢。你太老了”那另当别论。否则谁会在意呢。谁会真的愿意跟一个年纪较大、长得还行的艺术生结婚？对女性来说，年龄是一个很重要的因素。

I want to let more women know that you don’t have to care about what others think
Of course others are going to judge you if they want to marry you

“我想让更多的女性知道，你不必在乎别人的想法。”
如果他们想跟你结婚，他们当然是会评判你的。

[–]marku1 1 指标 1 天前 
if you are a woman this is an example of what not to do in life.

如果你是个女人，这就是个你一生都不该干的事情的例子。

[–]Rillanon 1 指标 1 天前 
Da fuq china girls are most empowered in the history of guo and still complaining.

我去，中国女生是历史上最有权力的女生了，郭你们还在抱怨什么。