印网友：印度最具讽刺意味的那些事

What are the biggest ironies in India?

印度最大的讽刺是什么？

QUORA网站读者评论：

外文：https://www.quora.com/What-are-the-biggest-ironies-in-India

Kommina Sivanand, Just 'An Indian'

Irony in India is..

Cost of a highly educated IAS couple marriage is Rs 500/-

Where as..

Cost of an illegal mining baron's daughter's marriage is Rs 500 crore.

Rs 500 marraige:

印度的讽刺在于…

受过高等教育的航空科学学院夫妇结婚，只花了500卢比

而...

一位非法采矿大亨的女儿的婚姻花费了5亿卢比。

500卢比的婚礼:

 

Ashish Vashishta and Saloni Sidana had cleared the IAS in 2013. They came closer during their training at the Lal Bahadur Shastri National Academy of Administration, Mussoorie.

Due to demonetisation, while many are complaining on govt, the couple has set an excellent example by getting married for just Rs 500.

The Rs 500 they spent on the wedding was their fee to the ADM court in Bhind, Madhya Pradesh. MP cadre IAS officer Ashish Vashishta is presently posted as the SDM in Gohad and Saloni as SDM in Vijayawada. Ashish is from Rajasthan, Saloni is from Punjab.

Ashish Vashishta和Saloni Sidana在2013年就进入了航空科学学院。他们在穆索里的拉尔·巴哈杜尔·沙斯塔里国家研究院的训练中走到了一起。

由于废钞令，尽管许多人都在抱怨政府，但这对夫妇却以500卢比的开销举办了婚礼，树立了一个好榜样。

他们花在婚礼上的500卢比是他们向中央邦Bhind行政法院支付的费用。中央邦的航空科学学院官员Ashish Vashishta目前被任命为戈哈德的SDM，Saloni被任命为Vijayawada的SDM。Ashish来自拉贾斯坦邦，Saloni来自旁遮普。

500 crore marriage:

Janardhan Reddy's Daughter's marraige.

The demonetisation couldn't make any effect on the marraige. It was one of the costliest so far.. Even income tax officials had raided his house to check his expenses.

50亿的婚姻:

加纳尔丹·雷迪的女儿结婚了。

废钞令对这场婚礼没有任何影响。这是迄今为止最昂贵奢靡的婚礼。就连税务官员也突击搜查了他的房子，检查他的开支。

Few highlights..

1.Janardhana Reddy's controversial history.

Janardhana Reddy is a son of police constable Chenga Reddy in Chittoor. He obtained his first iron ore mining license in Karnataka in 2004 and was implicated in the illegal mining scandal in Bellary in 2009. A few years later, he was arrested and sent to judicial custody. He was again arrested after releasing on bail as the bail was obtained by bribing the judge.Recently, he was released on bail.

以下是一些花絮看点...

1。加纳尔丹·雷迪有争议的个人经历。

加纳尔丹·雷迪是奇图尔市警员程达·雷迪的儿子。2004年，他在卡纳塔克邦获得了自己的第一份铁矿石开采许可证，并在2009年卷入了贝拉里的非法采矿丑闻。几年后，他被捕并被送往司法拘留。他因通过贿赂法官获得保释，随后东窗事发又被再次逮捕。最近，他被保释出狱。

2. Lavish and costly wedding invitation card.

 

Janardhan Reddy has reportedly spent over Rs 5 crore on the invitation cards. The boxed invitation has an LCD screen inside it. When the box is opened, LCD screen gets alive with a text announcing "Bramhani Weds Rajeev Reddy" followed by a song and dance by Reddy family.

2。奢华昂贵的婚礼请柬。

据报道，加纳尔丹·雷迪花费了5千万卢比制作请柬。盒装请柬里面有一块液晶显示屏。打开盒子时，屏幕上就会显示一条文字，上面写着“布拉哈尼与拉吉夫·雷迪喜结良缘”，然后是雷迪一家的歌舞表演。

3. Arrangements and money spent on them.

Janardhan Reddy has reportedly shelled out Rs 10 crore on the event management, Rs 20 crore on transportation of guests, Rs 5 crore on the invitation cards, Rs 20 crore on food to be served on the occasion, hundreds of crores on the jewelry and costumes for his daughter and family. He has mortgaged 10 of his properties to borrow money. He has also pledged a few of his properties in some foreign countries for the wedding. Reddy started making these transactions 6 months ago.

3.婚礼安排及开销。

加纳尔丹·雷迪据说为了婚礼策划花了1亿,为宾客的交通花费2亿卢比，为请柬花费5亿卢比，食物花费2亿卢比，女儿和家人的珠宝和服装花费数十亿。为了筹钱，他抵押了名下10处房产。他还为婚礼抵押了一些海外资产。加纳尔丹·雷迪于6个月前就开始筹划这些交易了。

4. Starry wedding.

Janardhan Reddy has invited hundreds of dignitaries from politics, business and other fields. He has invited several celebs from Kannada, Telugu and Hindi film industries. Many leading stars are expected to attend this event. Some celebs are reportedly set to perform at his daughter's wedding ceremony. If reports are to believe, the mining baron has paid hefty sum to celebs to make it to the event.

4。星光熠熠的婚礼。

加纳尔丹·雷迪邀请了数百名政界、商界和其他领域的要人。他邀请了几位来自坎纳达、泰卢固和印地语电影产业的名人。许多明星将出席这次活动。据报道，一些名人将在他女儿的婚礼上表演。如果报道属实，这位矿业大亨肯定向名人支付了巨额费用，才能让他们出席。

5. Security arrangements for the guests

Janardhan Reddy has employed 3,000 bouncers and special security at the Bangalore Palace ground. Over 300 police personnel have been employed for the VVIPs attending the wedding. Sniffer dogs and bomb squads have been deployed on location.

5。客人的安保安排

加纳尔丹·雷迪已经在班加罗尔皇宫雇佣了3000名保安和特别保安。为参加婚礼的贵宾雇佣了300多名警察。还在现场部署了嗅探犬和炸弹小队。

6. Priests from Tirupati Thirumala temple

Eight priests from Tirupati Thirumala temple have been brought in to perform the wedding rituals of Janardhan Reddy's daughter. The priests will perform pooja of the family deity Lord Venkateshwara and the main pooja will be performed by Janardhan Reddy and his family at the Purandara Mantapa, a replica of the temple from Hampi.

6。Tirupati Thirumala寺的祭司们

日前，蒂鲁帕蒂蒂·特鲁马拉神庙的八名牧师被邀请为加纳尔丹·雷迪的女儿举行婚礼。牧师们将表演家族神灵文卡特什瓦拉勋爵的普加舞，最重要的普加舞将由加纳尔丹·雷迪和他的家人在Purandara Mantapa表演，这是Hampi神庙的复刻版。

7. Wedding set arrangements

The Bangalore Palace grounds has been transformed into a mini-town of Bellary and landmarks like Cowl Bazaar, Dhanappa Beedi street, and the school which Reddy studied in have been created. Two houses for the bridegroom's family and bride have been built. The centrepiece of the wedding is a Vijayanagara styled temple built by Bollywood art directors and the dining area is set like a traditional village in Bellary.

7。婚礼设置安排

班加罗尔皇宫广场已被改造成贝拉里的迷你小镇，犹如Cowl Bazaar, Dhanappa Beedi街等地标，以及雷迪就读过的学校都已建成。还为新郎和新娘建造了两座房子。婚礼的中心是由宝莱坞艺术导演建造的Vijayanagara风格的寺庙，用餐区设置得像贝拉里的传统村庄。

8. Transportation arrangements for guests

Over 50,000 guests will attend Janardhan Reddy's daughter's wedding. The former politician has booked 1,500 rooms in star hotels to accommodate them. There will also be 2,000 cabs to ferry them to the venue, while 15 helipads have also been set-up to fly in VIP guests. The VVIP guests will be ferried from the entrance to the mandap area on cushioned bullock carts.

8。嘉宾交通安排

将有超过5万名宾客参加加纳尔丹·雷迪女儿的婚礼。这位前政客已经在星级酒店预订了1500个房间供他们住宿。届时将会有2000辆出租车将他们运送到会场，同时还会有15个直升机停机坪供贵宾乘坐。VVIP客人将乘坐软垫牛车从入口处进入。

 

Ameya Agrawal, Motivational Speaker | Author - A LEAP WITHIN | A Lifelong Learner

Recently I visited Ganpati Temple with my friend on the occasion of Ganesh Chaturthi. It begins with huge celebrations and Puja.

As we entered the temple, there were small kids, probably in the age group of 6 to 10 years who were wearing orange clothes and tilak on their forehead and were reciting some scriptures about Lord Ganesha.

My friend who was with his wife said to her “ There is a such a non-sense going on in India. Parents don’t even have the slightest understanding about their kids, they just decorate them in the orange dress with tilak and make them say things they don’t even understand”

“This is the reason our society is so backward compared to the developed countries” added that progressive Indian.

最近，我和我的朋友参观了象头神庙。以盛大的庆祝活动和祈祷开始。

当我们进入圣殿的时候，有一些小孩，年龄大概在6到10岁，他们穿着橙色的衣服，额头上点着红点，正在背诵一些关于伽内什领主的经文。

我朋友对跟在一边的妻子说:“印度这是在做毫无意义的事情。父母对自己的孩子一点都不了解，他们只是给孩子穿上橙色的衣服，点上红点，让他们说一些他们根本听不懂的话”

这位印度进步分子还说:“这就是为什么我们的社会与发达国家相比落后如此之多的原因。”

I was quietly listening and watching as everything happens but I didn’t say a word. After all, I came along with him in his car and had no intention to walk to my home.

We took blessings of Lord Ganesha and went back to the car. As we hit the highway, my friend closed the car windows, turned on the AC and was about to switch on the Radio when his five-year-old kid started demanding “ Papa! Papa! Vo chikni chameli wala song lagao na”

“ Dad! Dad! Please play that Chikni Chameli Song” - An item song from Bollywood

我静静地听着，看着发生的一切，但我一句话也没说。毕竟，我是和他一起坐他的车来的，根本不想步行回家。

我们得到了象头神的祝福，回到了车里。当我们驶上高速公路时，我的朋友关上车窗，打开空调，正要打开收音机时，他5岁的孩子开始喊“爸爸!爸爸!请放那首Chikni Chameli的歌”——宝莱坞的歌曲

 

He started crying till my friend didn’t connect his mobile phone and started playing the song.

It didn’t take long for the kid to catch his breathe once the song started playing and he started singing along. At times he was singing ahead while also dancing to the steps.

I was going to ask the kid and his father whether the kid knows the meaning and intention behind this song. But I kept quiet. ( I wanted to reach home safely)

然后就开始哭，直到我的朋友开始播放这首歌。

歌曲一开始播放，这孩子就缓过气来，开始唱歌，有时还一边唱一边跟着起舞。

我想问孩子和他的父亲，孩子是否明白这首歌背后的含义和意图。但我保持沉默。(我想要安全地回到家)

But on my way back home, I learned that the 5-year-old knew more items songs than I did and when I reached my place I had only one question in my mind. If we all have to make our kids learn something or the another which they may or may not understand, then what is better. The Vedas or the teachings of our ancestors which may not now but eventually train our kid’s subconscious minds.

We think Westernization is modernization. We blame and criticize people for their choices while we ourselves are nowhere near making all the right choices.

We criticize and demean people for having things we don’t have.

What do you think? Isn’t this behavior of ours ironic? What should we do about this irony?

但在我回家的路上，我知道5岁的男孩知道的歌比我更多，当我下车时，我脑子里只有一个问题。如果我们必须让我们的孩子学习他们可能理解或不理解的东西，那么什么才是更好的。吠陀经或我们祖先的教诲，也许他们现在不理解，但最终进入孩子的潜意识中。

我们认为西方化就是现代化。我们指责和批评别人的选择，而我们自己也并没有做出正确的选择。

我们批评和贬低那些拥有我们不曾拥有的东西的人。

你觉得呢?我们的这种行为难道不具有讽刺意味吗?对于这种讽刺，我们应该做些什么呢?

 

Amitabh Bhatt, Currently Fighting With Engineering at Govind Ballabh Pant Institute of Engineering and Technology Pauri Ga...

Here comes the biggest irony.

look at this man

这是最大的讽刺。

看看这个人
 

This man gets a bail by the court after running over poor people sleeping on the footpath.

On the other hand a boy in delhi spends one year in jail just for stealing Rs 200.(Source The Times of India)

这名男子碾过睡在人行道上穷人后获得法庭保释。

而德里的一个男孩因为偷盗200卢比被判一年监禁。(来源:印度时报)

 

We claim to be a nation of over 65% population below the age of 35.Still such a large youth populations believes in such superstitions inspite of having good education.

我们自称是35岁以下人口占比超过65%的国家。尽管受过良好教育，但仍有如此多的年轻人相信这种迷信。

 

Parents are said to old age home when they do not fit in.Children fail to bear with those individuals who taught them how to speak.

当父母年老的时候，我们让他们去养老院。孩子们无法忍受那些教他们说话的人。

 

People spend their entire savings just to celebrate one night.

and others go to a wedding just to have a good meal.

人们花光他们所有的积蓄只是为了庆祝一个晚上。

但还有一些人去参加婚礼只是为了美餐一顿。

 

Kumar Sourav, System Software Engineer | LynrdSkynrd's Simple Man

UPSC is one of India's most gruesome exam for the top job - Indian Administrative Services.

An aspirant has to work really very hard - 365x24 - to qualify . They are well read and very knowledgable. However, its the only few who are selected for the top job.

In a way, the selection or rejection process is justified since the selected are supposed to lead the nation in different roles. No problem at all.

Then one day the election results are out and some guy gets another top job for a state. His Qualification? Well, his formal education ended at class 9.

Meet Tejaswi yadav, son of Lalu Yadav, who is a one-time former deputy Chief Minister of Bihar.

UPSC是印度针对最高职位印度公务员的最可怕的考试之一。

有抱负的人必须非常努力地工作——365x24不停息——才能通过。他们很博学。然而，只有少数几个能被录用。

在某种程度上，录取工作是公正的，因为被选上的人应该在多个领域领导国家。完全没问题。

有一天，录取结果出来了，某个家伙得到了一个邦的最高职位。但他的资质如何?他接受的正规教育仅仅止步于9年级而已。

这是拉鲁·亚达夫的儿子特贾丝维·亚达夫。亚达夫曾是比哈尔邦的副首席部长。

 

​All those IAS ,who are in Bihar, are going to take orders from this guy .

P.S.: The intention is not to make fun of a person based on his educational background but expose the flaw and irony of our system.

比哈尔邦的航空科学学院，都得听从这个家伙的命令。

另:我不是为了拿某人的教育背景开玩笑，而是为了暴露我们制度的缺陷，看看这有多讽刺。

 

Srikanth, former Inplant Trainee (2017)

A real life example, which I can never forget.

We were 3 best friends since childhood, all 3 of us had pure love towards each other. Let me call them X and Y.

Me and X belonged to general category, Y belongs to ST category.

X’s father worked as a priest in our neighborhood temple, he was very friendly. Y’s father worked in IOCL at a very good position. X’s father barely made 9k and I never knew the pay of Y’s father.

有一个真实的例子，我永远不会忘记。

我们从小就是三个好朋友，我们三个人对彼此都有着赤子之心。我就把另外两人称为X和Y吧。

我和X属于一般种姓，Y属于ST种姓。

X的父亲在我们附近的寺庙当牧师，他为人很友好。Y的父亲在印度石油公司工作，职位很高。X的父亲收入很难超过9000卢比，我也不知道Y的父亲的工资是多少。

X lived in a shabby home, Y lived in big bungalow. X’s father dropped him in a bicycle, Y’s father dropper her in a car.

X had never received any incentives, the government was too blind to see them, Y received so many incentives, both were good in academics.

Y has received plots/houses in the name of their caste, on the other hand X has received none.

here comes the twist, on a very unfortunate morning I was told never to talk with X, he had to leave the school, and the reason? His father was accused of a theft, he stole all the gold from the idol of god, for the sake of his family. He was caught, jailed, the family felt humiliated, they shifted their village.

X住在破旧的房子里，Y住在大平房里。X的爸爸骑自行车接送他，Y的爸爸开车接送她。

X从来没有享受过任何奖励，政府太瞎了，看不到他们，Y享受了很多奖励，他们俩的学业都很出色。

Y以其种姓的名义获得了地块/房屋，而X则没有。

事情发生了转折，在一个非常不幸的早晨，我被告知永远不要和X说话，他必须离开学校，原因是什么?他的父亲被指控偷窃，为了他的家庭，他从神像那里偷走了所有的金子。他被抓住了，关进了监狱，家人觉得很丢脸，搬到别的村子。

fast forward to 2017

My friend X is now an auto driver, my other friend Y in spite of getting very low rank (the rank at which I can’t even dream of pursuing engineering in a decent college) in EAMCET (state level exam to join an engineering college) is driving her own car to college.

Had his father received any support from government, X’s life could’ve been otherwise.

THIS CASTE SYSTEM WILL NEVER END.

快进到2017年

我的朋友X现在是一个汽车司机，我另一个朋友Y尽管在EAMCET(工程学院入学的国家级考试)排名非常低(以她的排名，我根本不敢想能在像样的大学里修读工程专业)，却驾驶着自己的汽车上大学去了。

如果X的父亲能得到政府的任何扶持，X的生活就会是另外一番景象了。

这种种姓制度永远不会结束。

 

Neil Menon, As Indian an Indian can get

1. I’m now almost done with my PhD and the job offers I have are less than half of what I was offered after my master’s. Apparently, I’m over qualified! How messed up is that
2. People who go abroad for higher studies and stay back and help making that country’s economy better are branded as successful, and no one really knows the little 14 year old girl from a village in Kerala who invented the pedal powered washing machine[1]

1。现在我的博士学位差不多完成了，可我得到的工作机会还不到硕士毕业后的一半。很明显，我太大材小用了!这真是糟糕

2。那些出国深造并留在当地改善该国经济的人被打上了成功的烙印，没有人真正认识那个来自喀拉拉邦一个村庄的发明了脚踏洗衣机的14岁小女孩

 

3.Talk about ironies, Malavika Joshi wasn’t eligible to apply to colleges like IIT’s and NIT’s because she was home schooled, and yet she made it through MIT - the little school in Boston[2]

3.说到讽刺，Malavika Joshi没有资格申请像印度理工学院和NIT这样的大学，因为她是在家接受教育的，但她被麻省理工学院录取了——波士顿[2]的学校

 

4. It is perfectly okay to celebrate the death of a 13 year old girl after fasting for 68 days to bring “good luck” and “prosperity” to her father’s business while it is NOT okay to renounce religion and god. Nor is it okay to question this fucked up ritual[3]
5. Social workers go to slums and poorer districts of metropolitan cities to distribute food, clothes, and medicines, and end up getting raped by those who receive their help

4。为了给父亲的事业带来“好运”和“成功”，一个13岁的女孩禁食了68天，人们为她的死亡庆祝，认为这完全没问题，但背弃宗教和神则是绝对不可以的。也无需质疑这个该死的仪式

5。社会工作者去大城市的贫民窟和贫困地区分发食物、衣服和药品，最后却被那些受助者强奸了

 

Vibhor Pandhare, worked at Indian Institute of Technology, Bombay

Well, there isn't just one. Just like our population, every irony of India is big. In fact, more than being the world's largest democracy, we are more of the world's biggest irony.

这种事可不止一件。就像我们的人口一样，印度的每一个讽刺都是巨大的。事实上，我们不仅仅是世界上最大的敏煮国家，更是世界上最大的讽刺。

 

You may find a lot of  answers for this question already, but here, I have tried to connect them at the right points and present it in the form of a poem. More than simply enjoying it, let us also try to acknowledge what it really wants to convey. Here we go:

India has a population of 1.25 billion and half of them are below 25;

Every fifth person walking on this planet is an Indian and yet the world says we Indians are shy!

We live in a nation, where the rice is at Rs. 40/- per kg but the SIM Card is free;

Here a pizza reaches home faster than an Ambulance or Police, whatever the case may be!

Everybody in India wants to be famous, but nobody wants to follow the bumpy path!

对于这个问题，你可能已经找到了很多答案，但在这里，我想把他们串起来，用诗歌的形式写出来。除了简单地欣赏，我们也试着想想这些事真正反映的意思。我们开始吧:

印度有12.5亿人口，其中一半不到25岁;

在这个星球上，每五个人中就有一个是印度人，然而全世界都说我们印度人很害羞!

我们生活在一个大米价格达到每公斤40卢比，但SIM卡却免费的国家;

在这里，无论什么时候，披萨都比救护车或警察更快到达家门口!

在印度，每个人都想出名，但没人想走崎岖不平的路!

Talking to strangers is instantly tagged as immoral, but it’s perfectly ‘Sanskaari’ to marry one;

Priyanka Chopra earns more money playing Mary Kom than Mary Kom can ever earn!

In India we do not cast our vote but we vote our caste;

Politicians divide us first, then terrorists unite us at last!

We live in a nation where the National animal is endangered, the national pledge is unintended and the national river is polluted;

In India, we are placed inside a cubicle and asked to think outside the box.

Moreover, we export 80000 students to USA each year, further knocking down our building blocks.

和陌生人说话马上就会被贴上淫荡的标签，但嫁给陌生人则完全没问题;

普里扬卡·乔普拉扮演玛丽·科姆挣的钱比玛丽·科姆一辈子挣的都多!

在印度，我们不是投票，而是投票给我们的种姓;

政客们分裂了我们，然后恐怖分子把我们团结起来!

我们生活的国度，国家动物濒临灭绝，国家的承诺没有意义，国家的河流被污染;

在印度，我们被框在一个个，却被要求跳出思维定势。

此外，我们每年向美国输送8万名学生，进一步摧毁了我们的基础设施。

We believe in spending more money on our daughter’s wedding than on her education;

At least passing the 8th grade is a must to run a village, but to run the entire nation we have't kept any qualification.

India ranks sixth in the number of billionaires in a country yet homes a third of the world’s extreme poor.

We frown on government buses, hospitals, schools but smile on a government job;

We live where rapists and murderers roam freely but a person who posts on social media is beaten up by the mob!

India has the second largest pool of scientists and engineers in the world but we rank 76th in the Global Innovation Index on date;

And we still believe in our horoscope even when 39 Indians are born every moment and 34 Lakh Indians share the same birthdate!

我们愿意花更多的钱在女儿的婚礼上，而不是在她的教育上;

至少完成八年级学业是管理一个村庄的必要条件，但对于管理整个国家的人，我们没有任何资格要求。

印度在亿万富翁的人数上排名第六，却拥有世界上三分之一的赤贫人口。

我们不赞成政府公共汽车、医院、学校，却对政府工作微笑;

在我们生活的地方，强奸犯和杀人犯到处游荡，而在社交媒体上发帖的人却遭到暴徒的毒打!

印度是世界上科学家和工程师人数第二多的国家，但我们在全球创新指数中仅排名第76位;

我们仍然相信我们的占星术，即使每一秒都有39个印度人出生，340万印度人的生日相同!

Responsibilities are transferred faster in India than a Whatsapp message in United States;

Half of the households here have a cell-phone but don’t have an access to toilets!

People, here, will protect their phones with a screen guard so that the display doesn't get broken;

But, mind you, they will never wear a helmet, even if the road below them is shaken!

In India a black cat can do what a red traffic light cannot;

We teach our daughters how to dress properly but never tell our sons what they should not!

在印度，责任转移的速度比Whatsapp消息在美国传递更快;

这里有一半的家庭有手机，但却没有厕所!

这里的人们会用屏幕保护贴来保护他们的手机，这样显示屏就不会坏了;

但是，请注意，就算脚底的路面在晃动，他们也永远不会戴头盔!

在印度，黑猫能做红灯做不到的事;

我们教我们的女儿如何穿着得体，但从不告诉我们的儿子他们不该穿什么!

Here, a beer company owner is rich; though we can live without beer;

But we can’t live without food, then why is the Indian farmer poor?

An Indian will look both ways before crossing the road even if it’s a one-way;

We invest a mere 0.6% of our GDP in research and expect our nation to grow;

But we forget that to enjoy the fruits there has to be plant, whose seeds we first need to sow!

But the biggest Irony is that, people are proud about being an Indian even though they themselves might not have contributed in a single act that makes them feel proud about it.

这里的啤酒公司老板很有钱；尽管我们没有啤酒也没关系;

但是既然我们没有食物就不能生存，为什么印度农民如此贫穷呢?

印度人在过马路前会朝两边都看看，即使是单行道;

我们在科研方面的投资仅占GDP的0.6%，还指望我们的国家能得到增长;

但我们忘记了，想要享受果实，必须先播种!

但最具讽刺意味的是，人们为自己是印度人而自豪，尽管他们可能从未参与过任何一项让他们感到自豪的活动。